Shinri
by Matsuo Emi
Summary: Sakura's humdrum life as a Konoha medic-nin takes a turn for the worse, though admittedly less boring, thanks in part to a mysterious gift unintentionally left to her by an ancestor.
1. Habits

**Shinri "Truth"**

* * *

A/N: Welcome to my first fanfic. This story is Sakura centric, and I try to stay true to her character throughout the story. The story starts during the timeskip, while Naruto is off training. It's canon until that point, and starts to deviate from there. Sections of italics are thoughts or memories. Italics can also be emphasis on single words. Feedback of all stripes is welcome. Enjoy!

* * *

**Chapter 1: Habits**

**Truth - Agreement with a standard or original.**

* * *

"_Thank you."_

_Then darkness. And nightmares. His retreating back, his voice at her ear. Her unspoken fears, tempered by sheer lonely terror. It was the cold that woke her first. Unyielding stone pressed against her side and head. Voices. _

"… _you'll catch a cold…"_

* * *

"Sasuke-kun!"

Sakura yelled as she bolted upright. Her senses returned, and she realized she had been dreaming. Her comfortable bed sheets were in a tangled mess, and her night shirt and hair clung to her sweat moistened skin. She hadn't had that dream in years, but that memory was haunting her again, and for no apparent reason. Memories from two years ago came flooding in, along with unwelcome feelings of embarrassment, anger, and sadness.

* * *

_She had cried first. It seemed like she had cried for days. She even cried in front of the team that had been assembled to retrieve him. She had meant to be strong, but Naruto's strength and his conviction had caused her to break down in spite of herself. Her cheeks flushed at the memory of the expressions the others had given her. They showed sympathy, but also judgment. Weak. She was being weak again. Shinobi don't cry, especially not over something like that. Then she watched their backs, she watched Naruto's back, just as she had always done, as they left to save their friend. As they left her behind, again._

_Then she had been angry. She was angry at herself for still being so weak, despite all of her efforts since the Forest of Death, she was still a burden, still being left behind. She was angry at Naruto for returning empty handed. She was angry at him again when he left her behind, again, to train with the Sannin Jiraiya. She was angry at Orochimaru for taking Sasuke from her. But she was angry at Sasuke himself, for leaving of his own free will to pursue some petty revenge. Her anger had gotten the better of her a few days after Naruto had left her, and she threw a temper tantrum in her room when she thought she was alone. The book she had thrown, a silly romance novel, slammed into her over filled shelves, sending the entire precarious structure crashing down. The force of the impact knocked some of the floorboard slats loose, and the noise shook the house. Her mother, who had just walked through the front door, came running upstairs to find out if the roof had collapsed. Instead, she found a too embarrassed to be angry Sakura gaping at the horrible mess. "Clean it up!" and "I knew it wasn't good for a girl to have so many books!" were some of her mother's comments._

_Finally, she was resolute. Naruto's words of encouragement played on a record in her mind for days after he left. "I'm going to get stronger! I'm going to bring that bastard back! You'll see! Just you wait Sakura-chan! Just you wait!" She smiled then. She always smiled, even if it was fake. Pretty smiles, the kind you can't tell hide sorrow unless you are looking for it. "Just you wait… just …wait. Wait." Always waiting, always watching from the sidelines. Not anymore. Never again. She was going to work, train, do what it took to make sure that when Naruto returned, when they went to retrieve Sasuke, she would be standing beside him. And when Sasuke returned, and they were a team again, she would be strong enough, determined enough, to stand along side them, to hold the line __**with**__ them. "Sorry, Naruto-kun. No more waiting." She had asked the Godaime Hokage, the Sannin Tsunade to train her. To Sakura's surprise, Tsunade had accepted her as an apprentice. Sakura had been overjoyed, but mostly, she was resolute._

* * *

That was two years ago. She had been training for two years, and had achieved the rank of Chuunin without Naruto or Sasuke. She was rising in skill and starting to gain the respect of more experienced medics, including Tsunade. She had too much work to do, too much training to worry about to think about anything else, especially not unhappy memories from what felt like the distant past. She was resolute now, and not about to be distracted by thoughts over which she had no control.

She hopped out of her bed with vigor, determined to face the day's tasks with her usual energetic cheerfulness. Her weight hitting the wood floor made the loose floorboards bounce, but she paid them no heed as she scurried off to the bathroom, her agenda running through her mind.

"First, to the hospital to do the morning rounds," she informed her reflection, "Then meeting with Shishou, then lunch with the girls."

She smiled at the prospect of meeting with her friends for their habitual gossip over tea. Ino had always been more socially inclined than Sakura, and had convinced her and a pair of their female peers to become allies in the daily struggle as kunoichi. Really, Ino just liked to gossip. But it was a welcome reprieve from the antiseptic smell of the hospital, so Sakura attended happily.

"Then training with Shishou, until night fall," Sakura grumbled past her toothbrush.

"Then collapse into the bed, and do it all over again tomorrow," Sakura sighed as she straightened her clothes and ran her fingers through her pink hair. Satisfied by her humble but clean appearance, she headed out of her bedroom, grabbing her pack on the way out.

"Off to work, mom! See you tonight!" she called as she skipped through the house.

"Bye hun!" her mother replied automatically from the kitchen.

* * *

Konoha's streets were already bustling, even as the sun was just peeking over the horizon. On the way to the hospital, Sakura stopped at a favorite vendor for breakfast, since she rarely had time to make something at home. The friendly matronly lady handed Sakura her food with the same over done smile she had every morning. Sakura smiled back. It was a habit.

Konoha's hospital, like its streets, was already busy when Sakura arrived. She collected her clipboard, donned her uniform, and began her rounds. As the Hokage's apprentice, she was expected to take some of the more serious cases. The patients often could not be treated with traditional means alone, which meant that Sakura needed to perform medical jutsu, which meant she would be drained of chakra by the time she was expected to train with Tsunade. It was a typical day of civilian injuries, and there were no cases which Sakura was unable to handle. At the end of her shift, she did one last visit to all of her patients to give them a warm smile and a final check. It was a habit. On her way out of the hospital she hung up her dirty uniform, and her clipboard. There would be a new uniform and clipboard waiting for her the next day.

* * *

Just as the clear morning had indicated, the weather had turned out to be nice and sunny. It was afternoon, and the streets were filled with citizens and Shinobi alike, all with places to go, most with smiles on their faces. Sakura too wore a smile, which she brightened with friendliness each time she passed another person. It was a habit. When she reached the Hokage's office, she was called in immediately, since her Shishou was always expecting her.

Sakura entered the office, and immediately noticed a difference. Two ANBU stood to one side of the Hokage's desk, and Tsunade herself had an obscene amount of paper strewn across her desk, which would have not been out of the ordinary, except that most of it had 'classified' stamped across it in bold red letters.

"Have a seat Sakura-chan," Tsunade requested. Now that was odd. Sakura normally spouted off her report, got some verbal feedback/advice/abuse and then left. No sitting required. But Sakura did as she was told.

"An urgent mission has been sent in," Sakura nodded silently in understanding as the Hokage continued to explain the situation.

"A village along the northern border has sent word that they were attacked viciously two days ago. The survivors are in need of medical attention, and have requested aid. The Daimyo has decided to answer the request, however it was brought to our attention that this mission could be more dangerous than a simple relief mission."

Tsunade paused and shuffled through some of the papers on her desk until she found what she was looking for, "The survivors claim that they caught a glimpse of who caused the destruction. They all describe the same details; black cloaks and red clouds."

"Akatsuki?" Sakura interrupted as she leaned forward in her chair, trying to catch a glimpse of what the paper held.

"Yes," Tsunade confirmed, "And they may still be in the area since the reason for the attack has not yet been determined. For that reason, this is a classified A-rank mission. I'm sending mostly ANBU, and two Jounin. However, I am also sending you."

"Me!?" Sakura leapt up from her chair, "But I'm just a Chuunin! I'm still training, aren't there better Shinobi you should send?"

Sakura was flattered that Tsunade had so much confidence in her, but she was more flabbergasted than anything. Chuunin don't do A-rank missions, especially not classified ones involving a possible conflict with S-class missing-nin.

Tsunade remained collected but took on a less formal tone as she motioned for her apprentice to retake her seat. Sakura complied but remained on edge. She was nervous.

Tsunade made eye contact, "It is true, there are medic-nin who rank more highly than you as Shinobi, but there is no one who surpasses you in your medical abilities. You may be a Chuunin Shinobi, but you are an A-class medic-nin."

Sakura's jaw dropped. Never had she heard such encouraging or positive words from her Shisou, but they were genuine, and Sakura began to inwardly cheer.

"Even if they had given me the option of going myself, because they asked for the best medic-nin we had, I still would have sent you," Tsunade passed Sakura the mission brief and folded her hands, "Dismissed."

The two ANBU, no doubt two of Sakura's temporary future teammates, faded in an instant, and Sakura, still dumbfounded, slowly stood up and walked out of the office.

* * *

Sakura scanned the mission brief as she walked towards the café where Ino and the others were no doubt waiting for her. The brief was just that, brief. Six ANBU, two Jounin, and one medic-nin. Departure, tomorrow morning at 4 am. Travel time, three days. Administer aid, deliver supplies, leave. In all, including travel time and assuming that the ANBU are only along as a precaution, the mission would take just over a week. Something to break the routine.

Sakura folded the paper and stored it away safely in her pack as she entered the café. Just as she expected, Ino, Hinata and Tenten were already sitting at their usual table and chatting away. Well, Ino was chatting away.

The little group of kunoichi had become closer in the past year, but other than these meetings, largely kept to themselves still. Sakura considered Ino a close friend, as close as Naruto, but Hinata and Tenten were still more of acquaintances, though Ino's gregarious and nosy personality was beginning to get the other girls to open up a little more. Sakura found that she rather liked their company, especially Tenten, and wished they had more time in their lives to just get to know each other.

"Hey," Sakura greeted and pulled up a seat across from Ino, "Sorry I'm late, just got a new mission from Shisou. I'll be gone tomorrow, but should be back in a week or so."

"It's OK, forehead," Ino chided, "We just started without you."

"What's new on the grapevine today, oh great gossip pig," Sakura shot back at Ino playfully. Ino leaned forward, as if telling a secret to the three of them. And it began.

A right tirade of mud, scandals and sex came flowing forth from the blonde's mouth. Hinata listened attentively and respectfully, Tenten sipped her tea nonchalantly, and Sakura raised an eyebrow incredulously. Half of the things she said were utter crap, Sakura knew that, but it was still fun, even if just a little annoying.

Ino stopped, which signaled that the others were expected to follow suit in a similar fashion, which, if Ino had been paying attention to any of their past meetings would know, never happened. Hinata shrugged shyly, Sakura shook her head uninterestedly, but to everyone's surprise, Tenten leaned forward slyly. Everyone else out of shock or curiosity, mimicked her movement and the four girls huddled around the small table expectantly.

Tenten began, "The other day…" three urging nods, "I caught a glimpse of…" three slightly frantic nods, "a particular blonde beauty…" two vigorous nods and one hesitant one, "flirting with a particular" "STOP RIGHT THERE"

Ino stood straight upright, bright red. Her outburst had clearly identified her as the blonde in the story, but her interruption kept the object of her affections a mystery to Hinata and Sakura. Tenten sat back slowly in her chair, crossed her arms, and grinned smugly. She was clearly satisfied, and said no more. Sakura just laughed inwardly at how Ino's little gossip party had been turned against her. Tenten had just earned a smidgen more respect from the pink haired medic.

The rest of the lunch passed by in uneventful silence, and the four girls waved their goodbyes as they parted at the door. Ino's face had by then only faded to the color of Sakura's hair.

* * *

Because of the urgency of the mission, Tsunade had given Sakura the rest of the day off to prepare and rest. The travel would be fast and grueling, and Sakura needed to eat and sleep well to build up enough stamina to run for three days straight, heal everyone, and then run back.

When Sakura returned home earlier than usual, her mother, as expected, was nowhere to be found. She was no doubt out running errands or visiting the extended family, who willingly provided for their welfare after her father had died.

The Haruno were a family of civilians, merchants and farmers by trade, and as far as Sakura knew, she was the first Shinobi in the family. It had been made clear to her in the past that not everyone approved, but her mother's nagging encouragement had kept Sakura in school long enough to realize that she rather enjoyed being a Shinobi. Her mother's family was also civilian, but they were a mystery to her, since her mother never talked about them. Her mother was the only one who survived the most recent war in Konoha's history, so Sakura had assumed from a young age that the memory was just too painful.

The same war that claimed her mother's entire family, had also claimed her father when Sakura was just an infant. She and her peers were too young to remember anything, but the scars were written all over the village, on its buildings and the faces of its citizens. To make matters worse, the demon fox had attacked the same year the war had ended, further exacerbating the death toll.

The house Sakura and her mother lived in now, according to the Haruno family elders, actually belonged to her mother's family, since the Haruno have no record of owning the property themselves. Sakura assumed that it must have been owned by her grandmother or grandfather, but never asked. Sakura sometimes wondered what kinds of ghosts and memories the walls of her home held, but realizing that they belonged to her mother, she never pried.

After eating her fill in the kitchen, Sakura trudged upstairs to begin packing for the mission. Clothes, weapons, medical supplies. All neatly and efficiently packed to take up the least amount of space but still be easy to access in an instant. The kind of stuff they taught you at the academy. Silly little things, but the kinds of little things that separated honest Shinobi from grimy criminal Shinobi in Sakura's mind. She couldn't imagine Orochimaru or someone in Akatsuki neatly folding clothes, or keeping their kunai clean and shiny. They were dirty, bloody, people who hung out in caves and murdered children.

"Like those innocent villagers," Sakura frowned as she spoke out loud to the neat supplies she had placed by the door. She wondered how many survived, and what condition the village was in if they needed help so urgently. But they only sent one medic-nin. Sure, Sakura was good, according to her Shisou, the best, but there must not be many survivors if they still only needed one.

"Monsters," she grimaced at the venom in her own words. But they deserved it. Part of her, the angry bitchy part, secretly hoped she would encounter whoever attacked those innocent people, so she could punch the living daylights out of them. But the rational part of her knew that an S-class criminal would just dodge her punch, and then she would be left to pray that the ANBU on her team would come and save her.

Sakura sighed inwardly and surveyed herself in the mirror. Weak. Still too weak. Getting better, she allowed herself, but still not there yet.

* * *

A/N: I know, not much happened yet, it picks up, I promise! I love Ino, I really do, she seems like she'd be a gossip-pig, ne? I made up the stuff about Sakura's family, but the war was mentioned in the manga, so I'm using it to my advantage.


	2. The Meaning of Strength

**Shinri "Truth"**

* * *

**Chapter 2: The Meaning of Strength**

**Truth – Archaic: fidelity or constancy.**

* * *

Just as Sakura had feared, the night before her mission was a restless one. She gave up on sleep an hour before the rendezvous, and by 3:30 in the morning was dawdling in the fog around the main gate waiting for the rest of the team to appear. Her stomach refused to produce an appetite, but she had forced down some fruit for a little bit of energy. She was going to need it. As the 4:00 deadline approached, the ANBU began to congregate. They stood in a loose group around the gate, no one talking, and no one introducing themselves to Sakura. She had expected as much. At exactly 4:00, two young men wearing Jounin vests appeared in the misty morning light. Sakura breathed a sigh of relief. At least the mission wouldn't be spent having to deal with eight complete strangers.

"Shikamaru-san! Neji-san!" she greeted politely but enthusiastically. Shikamaru gave her a friendly nod but Neji raised an eyebrow at her presence.

"Are _you_ the medic-nin?" he asked, his disapproval evident in his tone.

"Yes," Sakura nodded, but avoided elaborating. She didn't need conflict of any sort on this mission. It promised to be emotionally draining without internal strife.

"This is an A-rank mission. Why is a Chuunin present, instead of a Jounin?" Neji's question was aimed more at Shikamaru, who had undoubtedly been assigned as the team leader.

Sakura, irritated at the implication, jumped in and answered, "Tsunade chose me because while I may be a Chuunin Shinobi, my medical skills are second to none. Shishou acknowledges that herself." Her sassy side got the better of her as she placed her hands on her hips and glared at the snobby Shinobi.

"Then what happens when a fight breaks out?" Neji retorted, unfazed by her attitude.

Sakura didn't skip a beat, "What happens is _I_ keep _you_ from dying."

She then turned on her heel and walked out of the gates. If he was going to be difficult, she could return the favor in spades. She honestly didn't know what Tenten saw in the cold judge mental bastard.

* * *

The following three days were torture. Sakura had been used to travel, that wasn't the problem. The problem was the unending silence. Her 'teammates' were hardly such, and no one had spoken a word since Shikamaru had given everyone their travel orders. The mood was tense, and unwelcome. There was no friendly banter, no unspoken bond of trust, everything was strictly _business_.

She knew, as every Shinobi was suppose to know, that the ANBU in the team, and Neji for that matter, wouldn't save her if she found herself in serious trouble unless it was required to ensure the success of the mission. Shikamaru was someone she could trust, and his orders would no doubt reflect that if she needed assistance, but he was hardly a friendly face. A respected, familiar face. But not really a friendly one. He wasn't a shoulder to lean on, someone to confide in. Not like Ino-pig, not like Naruto-kun, Kakashi-sensei, or Shishou. Not like Sasuke.

No. That's not it either. Sasuke wasn't like that either. Not really. Sakura had always hoped and dreamed that someday he would be the knight in shining armor who would sweep her off of her feet. Comfort her when she cried, whisper sweet nothings. Nothing. Just the foolish fantasy of a love struck pre-teen. She had loved him then, foolishly. She still loved him, and always would, but knew and accepted that the love would never be returned. It wasn't the point anymore. She didn't need it to be.

"_Great,"_ Sakura huffed to herself, _"This shitty mission is making me think about useless things."_ Now was not the time to be getting distracted, not since they were fast approaching the village. Sakura collected her thoughts and stuffed them back in place in the recesses of her mind. She probed the surroundings with all of her senses to find out if the village was near. The smell made her heart stop.

Death. It smelled like death. Wafting in on the steady breeze was the unmistakable stench of corpses. The morgue at the hospital had a similar smell, but it was tempered with cleaning solution and embalming fluids. This smell was pure, and horrifying. The smell of upturned earth, blood, and smoke filled her nostrils a few minutes later. Then the sounds came. Frantic cries, screaming children, and crackling fires. Sakura's chakra was assaulted by the hysterical chakra signatures that filled the area ahead of her. She wasn't sure she was going to be able to handle it.

As the Konaha relief team burst through the last line of trees, they came to a steady halt. Sakura took time to observe the situation as objectively as she could manage. The village had been leveled. It was as if a huge foot came crashing down from the sky and carelessly crushed the buildings in a single tread. The surroundings resembled a crater, and much of the tree line along the edge of the town had also been destroyed. Swaths of destruction stretched through the forest in multiple directions like tendrils on a vine.

Along what was left of the buildings, small groups of villagers gathered. They huddled together, some rocking back and forth, many sobbing, some staring listlessly into nothingness. Children screamed for their mothers or fathers, most went unheeded.

The source of the smoke and crackling fire was impossible to miss. A pile, no, a veritable tower of human corpses, stacked easily as tall as a house, burned with licking orange flame. Beside it, more corpses, waiting for their turn to be scavenged for useful items and then disposed of forever in the purifying fire.

Sakura focused on the injured, focused on the numbers, focused on the task at hand, anything, everything, to keep her from breaking down in fits of hysteria like one of the unfortunate survivors. The village must have had at least one thousand inhabitants, it wasn't a tiny place, and from what Sakura could see, only four dozen or so survived. The injuries were extensive as well. Many looked half crushed, most had broken limbs or oozing wounds. All had some form of contusion. Even the men burning the bodies had injuries, though they worked diligently through their pain. One of them stopped his work long enough to approach the group of Konaha Shinobi.

"Are you the ones the Daimyo sent to help us?" he asked politely, though it was forced.

"Yes," Shikamaru answered. There was a long uncomfortable silence.

Sakura took a deep breath.

"I need lines," Sakura began hesitantly at first, but then she gathered her composure, "Get everyone into groups, lines, some indication of who is most injured and needs immediate medical attention."

Sakura turned to the rest of her group, to make it obvious she was speaking to them. No one moved at first, but at least Shikamaru nodded. Her green eyes flashed in annoyance.

"NOW," she ordered, and began to unpack her medical supplies. She quickly donned a simple white medic apron, and pulled her long pink hair into a sloppy bun. As she jogged over to a group of unconscious bleeding villagers she glanced over her shoulder and shot a death glare in the direction of her loitering team. The ANBU began to move.

With her supplies in order, and her orders being followed, Sakura began to treat the most severe cases. Several villagers were near death with infection, so she shoved a pack of antibiotic and anti-inflammatory injections into Neji's still idle hands.

"Administer one injection of each to those five people with infections," was her curt order. Sakura turned to continue stabilizing her most serious patient. Neji reluctantly trudged off to do as he was told.

With the help of her eight teammates, Sakura was able to sort, stabilize, treat, and almost completely heal every villager by the next morning. She didn't have the chakra or supplies to return everyone to one hundred percent, but they were all on their way, and were going to be fine. Physically. It was all they could do.

Sakura had avoided conversation with the villagers, which was easy enough since no one seemed able or willing to talk. There was nothing to say. She didn't make eye contact with the man who had lost an arm, the child with horrible scars on her face, or the young woman who clutched the dead body of her infant like a precious doll. Sakura didn't want to see what it was like. Guessing would give her nightmares enough. She didn't need to know. She didn't want to know.

The emergency supplies, though scant, were left with one of the men who would no doubt be looked to as the new leader in this uncertain time. Sakura could only hope he was a fair and decent person.

* * *

It had only occurred to Sakura on the second day of the return trip that fortune had smiled upon her and the team. Akatsuki hadn't been sighted since the attack, and their group was completely unscathed. The ANBU hadn't been needed after all. There had been no fighting. It was a meager comfort for the swirling emotions Sakura was still fighting back. The trip back wasn't as rushed, and they arrived late in the evening of the day they were scheduled to return. Sakura delivered her mission report, and quietly returned home to get what sleep she could before falling back into the routine early the next morning. The routine had been boring, the break had been welcome. But the mission made Sakura appreciate her monotonous existence. Now the routine was welcome.

She snuck up the stairs and quietly entered her room. No need to wake her mother. Once the door to her bedroom was closed, Sakura lost her white knuckle grip on her fragile composure. She collapsed on the floor in a fit of pitiful sobs. Tears streaked her pale face and began to pool on the wood beneath her. She could still smell the stench, still hear the cries, still see the empty faces. Sakura felt sick.

She pushed back the nausea with the only emotion she felt more powerfully now. Anger. She was furious at the kinds of people, no, not people, _monsters_, who could hurt so many people so completely. She felt anger, not for those who died, she realized now that they were the lucky ones. It was the ones left behind, forced to live through the trauma, forced to pick up the pieces and try to keep on living in spite of it all, who Sakura felt for the most. She wondered if she would have had the strength or courage to move past such an experience. Or would she be one of the empty ones, the ones who looked like they were just waiting to die too. Could you ever smile again? Could you ever breathe again? Could you ever live again?

Realization dawned on her that she knew people who had lived through such an ordeal, and who had smiled for her. Sasuke, as withdrawn as he was sometimes, seemed downright normal when he tried hard enough, in spite of loosing his entire family and clan in a single night. But more than him, she realized that her mother had even more strength. Her cheerful, happy, nagging, determined mother, had lived through worse trauma. Her family, and her loving husband had all been torn from her in a similar fashion. Sakura was the only thing that her mother had left. She found herself suddenly admiring and understanding her mother more now than she ever had before. Sakura then hoped that if the day ever came she could be just as strong as her mother.

* * *

Sakura woke to the sound of her alarm clock blaring. Her mother must have set the damn thing for her, in anticipation of her return. Her eyes snapped open, and she realized that in her exhaustion, she had cried herself to sleep right in the middle of the floor. Her bare tear streaked cheek stuck to the floor board as she sat upright and rubbed her eyes dazedly. It moved. Sakura looked down at the piece of wood she had been sleeping on and realized that it had been pulled up and jostled aside enough for a half inch sized gap to form in the floor. It must have been knocked loose when her book shelf collapsed several years ago. She reached a finger into the gap to investigate the damage. The wood board came free easily, and Sakura placed it to the side so she would remember to fix it when she got home that night. The hole in the floor should have given Sakura a clear view of the kitchen ceiling, but when she glanced down as she got to her feet she noticed that the space was filled tightly with a fabric wrapped box.

"What in the…" Sakura peered down at the box, and curiosity overshadowed her need to get ready for work. She tenderly hoisted the object out of the hole. The fabric was yellowed and fragile with age and it crumbled slightly as Sakura handled it. Gently, she peeled back the layers of the cloth, revealing a simple bamboo wood box. Sakura kneeled and placed the box at her knees. She carefully pried the lid off, not sure what treasures or terrors the box may contain. Inside, were four old, but well preserved, unmarked scrolls. That was all.

"Sakura! Are you home?" her mother's yell startled Sakura out of her distraction. She didn't know why, but she felt compelled to hide the box from her mother. Hastily, she replaced the floor board and slid the bamboo box under her bed. Discovering the contents of the scrolls would have to wait until Sakura got back from training later that night.

"Yeah, mom!" she called down the stairs, "I'm getting ready for work!"

"Oh! OK!" her mom bellowed over the sound of the blender in the kitchen. With a quick glance back at her room to make sure nothing would look amiss, Sakura strolled into the bathroom to begin her daily routine.

* * *

A/N: Neji, what an ass. Loveable ass. Alright, the plot bunnies are starting to appear. What's in the scrolls!? I dunno!? Read the next chapter!?


	3. The Meaning of Love

**Shinri "Truth"**

* * *

**Chapter Three: The Meaning of Love**

**Truth - Honesty; integrity; truthfulness.**

* * *

It was like she had never left. Konoha was exactly as she had left it. The Hospital was exactly as she had left it. Even some of her patients were the same. The café at lunch time had a new special, but it was otherwise unchanged. Ino hadn't changed, Tenten hadn't changed, Hinata hadn't changed. Sakura realized she was being silly for reveling in the constancy of her village, she had been gone only a week. Of course nothing was going to change. Nothing had changed in almost two years. But her experience left her shell shocked, and try as she might, she couldn't shake the feeling that she was a stranger in her own hometown. How could things be so perfect here, when everything else in the world was going to hell?

Tsunade wasn't in her office when Sakura had first stopped by, but last second meetings or sudden sake breaks were no uncommon occurrence where the Godaime was concerned. So Sakura went to lunch, then returned to the Hokage's office to report and begin training.

"Come on in," Tsunade called from her office before Sakura could raise a hand to knock. She pushed past the doors and strode into the room.

"Have a seat," Tsunade instructed. Sakura blanched. Sitting. Again.

"_Another mission already, or is Shisou just feeling chatty today?"_ she groaned to herself as she took a seat across from the Hokage.

Tsunade shuffled some papers, "You're done Sakura."

Sakura raised an eyebrow and politely restrained her confused panic.

"Shikamaru included in his report an observation regarding your skills as a medic."

Surely Sakura hadn't done anything wrong. Right?

"He and the ANBU present were highly impressed with the professional and efficient way in which you handled the crisis. They said you had more composure than some medics with twice your experience."

Sakura was getting floored by her Shisou more often than was healthy. She licked her dry lips and tried to hide her relief.

"In short, you're done. I've taught you all I can teach you. The only thing that makes me a Sannin and keeps you a Chuunin is experience. That's nothing that can be taught, you have to do that for yourself."

Sakura nodded politely, to show her attention, but her head was spinning with the possibilities of the next revelation.

"The only question, is what to do with your free evenings. Shizune suggested I increase your pay and hours at the Hospital."

Sakura didn't bother hiding her 'yuck' face. Tsunade let out a single dry chuckle.

"Thought not. I think you are better off doing independent training from now on, like other Shinobi of your rank are expected to do. Feel free to take on students if you feel so obliged, but your duties at the Hospital meet the basic criteria of Chuunin duties, so it's not required. I understand you may want to train together on occasion still, however, in light of my decision, I've already started filling my own evenings with…"

Sakura raised an eyebrow. Tsunade sat further back into her chair.

"…alternative commitments."

"_Alcoholic,"_ Sakura grumbled to herself.

Tsunade folded her hands and began to scan over some the papers strewn across her desk. That was Sakura's signal to dismiss herself. So she did.

* * *

Had that really happened? Sakura sat in her room on her bed, still to shocked to do the independent training Shisou had suggested. One week ago, she thought she was just keeping up. Just starting to earn respect. Just starting to become something other than weak and useless. Then her Shisou had called her the best. And meant it. A week later, her Shisou declared that she had nothing else to learn, just things to experience. And meant it.

Was Sakura really that blind to her own improvement? Or were people giving her more credit than she deserved? Sure she had kept a calm exterior, but if they had known what tremulous emotions lurked just beneath, would they still have respected her? Sakura was an emotional wreck. She hated that part of herself. It wasn't gone, wasn't fixed, it was just well hidden from the outside world. They gave her credit. She couldn't help but feel like she didn't deserve it.

Now she had the evening to herself. After lunch at the café, she was expected to find ways to train, find ways to improve, and all on her own. If only she was as motivated as some of her peers. People like Lee, who can beat themselves up on a daily basis and still love every minute of it. Obstacles to him were not stumbling blocks, but opportunities to improve by overcoming a challenge. His stubbornness was part of his Shinobi way, and Sakura admired that a little, even if he was just annoying most of the time. She smiled a little when she recalled their most recent conversation.

* * *

"_Sakura-san!" Lee came running enthusiastically over to her, green suit stretching and bowl cut hair flapping in the wind. She groaned but tried to greet him back with some enthusiasm of her own._

"_Hey," she raised an uncomfortable palm, "Lee-san."_

"_Sakura-san!" he bowed deeply and took on his 'determined guy' face when he reached her. He had a tendency to stand too close to her, and today was no exception. She could feel him take a deep breath._

"Oh, gods. Here we go."_ Sakura forced herself to keep smiling._

"_Sakura-san! If your day is free, I would be honored if you would join me for dinner!" he was practically yelling. Subtlety was not one of his strengths. Sakura feigned disappointment through clenched but smiling teeth._

"_That would be great, Lee-san, but I have training with Shisou," her words, as usual, deflated his sails, "Maybe another time?" She was lying, she never did have time for things like that, and besides, even if she did, she wouldn't spend time with Lee. He was too… peculiar. She wasn't rude to him like when she was young, but she absolutely did not return his 'affections'. The least she could do was turn him down politely. She didn't wait for his response, but waved a curt 'good bye' and ran off towards the training fields. Lee, ugh._

* * *

Now Sakura had the time to do something other than train. She needed to come up with a reliable excuse, and quick. Her thoughts brought her back to the scrolls she had found that morning. Maybe there was something interesting in them that could inspire her to research the history of her house, or maybe her mother's family. At least then she could hide from Lee in the library, or stay holed up in her room until night fall.

She reached under her bed and removed the bamboo box. The scrolls were exactly as she had left them. There were four, and they bore no indication of what they contained or which one was meant to be read first, so Sakura did the logical thing. She pulled out the right most scroll. She handled it carefully, since such an old piece of paper would no doubt be extremely fragile. She unrolled a small portion and placed it on the bed in front of her. Inside the scroll, an old picture had been placed, it too was yellowed with age, but the image was still visible and crisp.

Sakura's eyes grew wide. It was as if she was looking at a picture of herself. The woman in the image bore an uncanny resemblance to Sakura, down to the green eyes and pink hair. She wore long formal but humble looking robes, her hair was tied in a tight bun, and she wore very ornamental makeup. The photograph was clearly very old, taken in a time when the technology was just being developed, since the woman wasn't smiling and the color had been hand painted. On the back, a name was written in the neatest kanji Sakura had ever seen, "Akimoto Miharu."

Sakura had no doubt in her mind that this woman was an ancestor of hers, from her mother's side of the family. Did her mother know about this woman? The scrolls seemed so old, surely it was before her time as well. Who exactly was she? Maybe the scroll would tell.

"_By the time anyone reads this,"_ Sakura began, realizing immediately that the woman in the picture was the one who wrote the calligraphy in the scroll. The handwriting was the same as the kanji on the back of the picture. Sakura continued reading, _"I will be dead. Not by the slow slip of time, but by the hands of my family. I have dishonored them, but do so with only the greatest of intent. My mind, some have said, is unbecoming of a woman, and it is now because of that mind that I must be punished. My mind, my wandering mind, they say, is to blame for my predicament. I disagree. It is out of my heart, out of the love and compassion I feel for the people of my family and my village that I will stand before them and be judged as a criminal. I meddled in affairs forbidden to women. I discovered powers forbidden to all. It's a sacrifice I'm willing to make. These scrolls contain jutsu I developed to help me protect the people I love. Granted, as they fear, I acknowledge that the potential these jutsu, and any jutsu, could unlock can be easily abused. But that was not my intent. I can only hope and pray that by leaving them sealed and hidden in the house of my family that only people I can trust will be able to find them. If you, dear reader, are one of those people, do as you wish with the scrolls. Only keep them out of the hands of those that would create destruction with them. Keep them to yourself if necessary. If you use them, then only use them as I had intended. Keep my sacrifice from being in vain. Sincerely, Mi-chan."_

Tears had welled up in Sakura's eyes as she read. She couldn't imagine so bravely facing death at the hands of the people you loved enough to die for. It was ironic, and cruel. Sakura had been looking for something to keep her busy. She surely found it. Touched by her ancestor's story, she swore to fulfill her dying wishes. Even though she didn't know what they were, Sakura was going to try to learn the jutsu, and only use them to protect people.

If Miharu was alive at a time when women were not allowed to be Shinobi, she was at least Sakura's Great, Great Grandmother. She might have even been alive before Konoha was officially formed, back when it was still just a tiny civilian village in the war torn Fire country. It was a violent and blood stained part of history. No wonder she felt the need to create jutsu designed to protect her loved ones.

Sakura reached back into the box, and pulled out the three scrolls. She unfurled the first, the heading said "Time." The second, "Life." The final scroll had the heading "Immortality." Sakura blanched. If these jutsu actually worked, she had just stumbled upon three of the most sought after and failed jutsu in all of history. What's worse, they were kinjutsu, which means they were all forbidden. Even having possession of the scrolls was against the law. But Sakura had already promised to try to learn them. _ Try_. There was no way any of them worked. No way. Sakura began to scan the information. The theories were simple enough, her eyes widened as she read. Maybe they _could_ work. She could barely contain her excitement and nervousness. Then, she stumbled.

They weren't even complete. None of them! She more frantically skimmed through all three, twice each, and just as she had expected, they all had holes. None of them were much more than theories at this point. Sakura flopped back against her pillow, her brief power trip fading quickly. Well, she _was_ looking for _something_ to do. No one would fault her for kicking the ideas around a bit, especially since no one even knew they existed. Just theories, just talking, put down on paper. Harmless banter, that couldn't be against the law? But no need to be a blabber mouth. After all, it was just a way for her to fill the day.

Sakura scurried over to her desk and pushed the clutter off of the surface in a single swipe. She delicately placed her three scrolls in one corner, pulled out some notebook paper, a pen, and sat down to write. She read and wrote all evening, and ran around in mental circles until, exhausted, she fell asleep at the desk, pen still in hand.

* * *

A/N: The plot bunnies multiply. So the scrolls aren't anything magical and super, but that's OK. But Lee, he's precious. One of my favorite characters to write. He makes me giggle, I sure hope you giggled too. Expect to giggle more soon. Like next chapter soon. And I forgot to mention that I made Shika a Jounin, which isn't canon. Only Neji is a Jounin. But Shika is on a level of his own, so I think he deserves it, ne?


	4. Hurdles

**Shinri "Truth"**

* * *

**Chapter Four: Hurdles**

**Truth - Accuracy, as of position or adjustment.**

* * *

Sakura woke to the sound of her alarm clock blaring. She sat up, pulled the paper off of her face, and rubbed her eyes sleepily. She had fallen asleep at her desk.

"_I really need to start sleeping in the bed again,"_ she groaned groggily as she stumbled into the bathroom. Her studiousness had earned her nothing except for another sleepless night, and it was going to take all of her focus to not let it interfere with her work at the hospital that morning.

The scrolls, she decided, were useless, if not slightly entertaining, so she left them, along with a pile of sloppy notes, on her desk in confidence that even if her mother saw them, she wouldn't think anything of them. With her morning routine slowly beginning to take a more familiar shape, she straightened her hair and clothes, grabbed her bag, and left for the hospital.

* * *

Sakura's shift at the hospital went as expected, and the report she filed at Tsunade's office reflected the fact that everything was running smoothly. It was nice, Sakura had decided, to have some solidarity in her life. The Konoha Hospital was that for her. Something constant, unchanging, because Konoha would always be in need of medics, even if there were no Shinobi. Take the case of the friendly carpenter's apprentice she had met earlier that day. The young, and admittedly somewhat handsome man, had fallen from his second story scaffolding while updating a nice family's windows. He had broken his leg pretty badly, but it was nothing Sakura couldn't handle, and the carpenter was eternally grateful to Sakura for averting, what he considered, a life threatening catastrophe. Those were the cases that kept her coming, those were the patients that kept her smiling. Maybe it was selfishness, but Sakura much preferred Konoha's Hospital to situations like the relief mission she had recently returned from. It wasn't that she didn't want to help people like that, it just bothered her that people needed help like that in the first place. Maybe ignorance really was bliss.

On her way from Tsunade's office to the Café, Sakura felt a familiar chakra approaching fast. She groaned and rubbed her forehead. She was much too sleepy and grumpy to put up with Lee. In spite of her best efforts to remain inconspicuous in the crowd of the Market Street, Lee sniffed her out like a love struck puppy. Here we go.

"Sakura-san!" Lee was just as loud and overbearing as usual. Some people in the crowd turned to find the source of the disturbance. Some smiled as they mistook Lee for a love interest. How embarrassing.

"Hey," Sakura raised an uncomfortable palm, "Lee-san."

The determined look, the deep breath. And something in Sakura snapped. She had lost it.

"Hey," she interrupted before he could holler out his usual invitation, "Wanna train together some time?"

Yep, she had lost it. Certifiable. Insane. Unsalted nuts.

He just stared then. For what felt like five minutes, he just stared, slightly hunched over, mouth agape only inches from her face, staring at Sakura as if she had sprouted wings and asked him if he preferred spicy or barbeque. Eventually, he began to nod. Slowly at first, escalating into nodding so frantic, Sakura was sure his head would fly off.

"This afternoon then?" she smiled and tried to ignore his…peculiar… behavior, "Field three?"

His nodding stopped, but still at a loss for words, he simply gave her the 'good guy' pose and puffed out his chest until it looked like his green spandex suit would burst. Sakura took it as a yes, and turned on her heel. Trying not to run for dear life, she headed for the Café to meet Ino and the others for lunch.

* * *

"_What the hell was that!?"_ Sakura demanded to know what she had been thinking when she suggested training with Lee. He was going to mistake it for a date, or something equally horrible and embarrassing. She was sure of that. But why Lee? Shouldn't Sakura find Kakashi-sensei and ask him to train? Or Ino-pig would make a better training partner than Lee. LEE. Ugh.

Maybe Sakura was just tired of the harassing, though well intentioned, almost daily invitations. Maybe she really admired his taijutsu and thought he had something useful to teach. Maybe Sakura should skip lunch and check herself into the psycho ward. But there was no going back now, she wasn't that shallow and heartless towards the guy, not anymore. She would just have to make it _very_ clear from day one that they are _just _training. She would just have to make it _very_ clear from day one that _no one_ else was to know about it. Ino could _not _find out.

Sakura pushed her thoughts aside as she entered the Café. As usual, everyone was waiting, and she took her accustomed seat across from Ino. The conversation was light, and typical. Ino spouted gossip, everyone listened. Tenten didn't have any witty remarks, but neither did Sakura. She did tell everyone that her evenings were free from now on, since Tsunade had 'graduated' her. Ino had taken it as an invitation to follow Sakura back as she headed home after lunch, since the path took her past her parents flower shop anyway.

"Maybe I'll talk to mom and dad about switching my shift, forehead," Ino suggested, as the pair strolled unhurried through the streets, "You know, so we can train in the evenings together. I only work at the hospital on the weekends, so I've got time on the weekdays."

Sakura nodded, she _had_ been thinking about training with Ino more. Since Sakura had taught Ino basic medical jutsu, it only made sense that they practice together and test each other's skills.

"I've still got _some_ training obligations, but a couple of times a week would be really nice," Sakura conceded. She failed to elaborate that her obligations involved a green spandex wearing weirdo.

"Yeah, I've got… obligations… too," Ino smirked slyly. Sakura raised an eyebrow at her friend.

"This… _obligation_ have a name, Ino-pig?" Sakura pried, since Ino had brought it up, she assumed she was supposed to ask.

"Yeah, but I'm not telling anyone!" she stuck her tongue out in jest. Sakura pushed her friend by the shoulder playfully.

"It's nothing sure yet, just, you know," Ino examined the sky with interest as she talked, "…fun."

"I guess I can't really relate, but I'll try my best to be happy for you, or something," Sakura looked up to see if the sky held as much interest as the blonde was making it seem. A comfortable silence fell, as Ino seemed lost in her own thoughts. After a few minutes, she turned to Sakura.

"Life's funny sometimes, ne?" Ino was feeling introspective, so Sakura respectfully just listened, "Things never seem to turn out the way you plan."

"Yeah," Sakura agreed, relating the comment to her own experiences.

"But you know what?" Ino continued as she stepped onto the stoop of her parents' flower shop, "It's not always a bad thing." She winked a smiling blue eye, and disappeared inside. Sakura wasn't sure she could quite agree with the last statement.

* * *

After a quick stop at her house to collect some training equipment and check on the scrolls, Sakura headed straight to training area three. It was her usual training spot, so she suspected it wouldn't be in use, as usual. Also, as she had suspected, her scrolls were exactly where she had left them, and it looked like her mother hadn't even entered her room.

Sakura was almost an adult, well, she was almost fifteen to be more accurate, and either way, she was more than capable of keeping her room in order without her mother's help. She was just glad her mother respected her space, and was starting to respect Sakura herself a little more every day as well. She didn't nag or push Sakura as much as she used to, probably because Sakura was finally starting to take the responsibility of a Shinobi much more seriously than she did as a Genin.

Back at the academy, she only focused as much as was necessary to pass. She aced written exams, easily, but in the physical tests she just kept up with the average, because she was more concerned with gaining the attention of Sasuke. She did everything she thought would work, and none of it did. Grew long hair, practiced a demure face, starved herself to stay thin. And in the end, it all probably had the opposite effect. He thought her annoying, and weak. A burden. She should have taken her Shinobi training as seriously as her mother had encouraged her to from the beginning. If she had, then she wouldn't have so much catching up to do today. If she had, then she wouldn't be training in taijutsu with Lee. LEE, ugh.

She rounded the last corner, which gave her a clear view of the entrance to training area three. He was waiting for her. He was standing by the gate, doing deep knee squats. Sakura had a sudden urge to turn back before he spotted her. But she was too late. His head snapped suddenly in her direction, and he stood to attention, one hand shot straight into the air. Sakura guessed it was a type of greeting. She warily approached. Gods, here we go.

"Sakura-san!" he shouted her name in his usual tone. Sakura smiled, a little forced, and walked right past him and into the training area. He followed, skip-jogging at her heels.

"We are here to train, Lee-san," Sakura didn't turn around as she addressed him, but she could hear the swish of his hair and suit as he nodded forcefully.

"I thought we could do taijutsu training together," she continued, "Since Tsunade already taught me her style, I thought training with you could help make me…faster." Sakura couldn't help but feel a little dirty for some reason. She couldn't place the source of the feeling though. Eventually, she worked up the courage to turn around.

Lee, as expected, was standing too close, and hunched over slightly as if hanging on every word she said. When she grudgingly made eye contact he shot to attention, and saluted with enthusiasm.

"Excellent idea, Sakura-san!" he shouted. Sakura hoped what she felt blow past her face wasn't spit.

"I would be honored to train with you in the art of taijutsu!" and he struck a pose which could only be described as… awkward.

Sakura nodded, and did her best to smile.

"Ok, then, no time to waste," Sakura remembered her lack of sleep and waiting scrolls, "since I can't stay the entire evening, this… session, _'that word sounds dirty too,'_ will be cut short. Next time will be more normal, though."

"Understood, Sakura-san!" and he saluted again.

"_Gods, he can calm down any time,"_ Sakura refrained from rolling her eyes, and took a fighting stance.

"Don't go easy on me, Lee-san," Sakura warned and Lee's face drooped, "I won't return the favor."

He paused, but eventually, and Sakura noted, nervously, nodded.

* * *

For the first several minutes, neither of them moved. Sakura, realizing that Lee was still too much in 'gentleman mode' made the first move, even though he hadn't revealed an opening, just to get the sparing started. Without warning, she launched herself forward, one balled fist pulled back and glowing. She purposely missed him by a mile, and planted her chakra infused fist into the ground where he had been standing. The ground groaned as a huge rift opened and spread, marring the landscape and uprooting several trees. Lee visibly gulped, but quickly recovered, and the match was on.

They danced around each other for nearly an hour, neither one gaining an upper hand, but Sakura could tell from the beginning what the outcome of the match would be. Lee, if he ever started taking the fight seriously, would easily win with his superior taijutsu skills. He was just too fast for Sakura to land one of her devastating blows, but his attacks, while contacting occasionally, had difficulty breaking past her chakra infused defenses. It was a stale mate. The training area was beginning to resemble the surface of the moon as Sakura's punches and kicks missed her nimble opponent and slammed into the ground or trees instead. Craters dotted the landscape, and trees lay scattered in bits and pieces.

As the match drew on, Sakura was becoming impatient with Lee. She knew he could do better, and was determined to draw it out of him. He flew at her from the right, and Sakura let the punch contact, only blocking it with her shoulder. She turned suddenly, ignoring the hit she had just received, and pinned Lee down with a flurry of quick but powerful punches. He was using all of his concentration to defend himself, and Sakura jumped at the opportunity. As she stepped into another punch, she brought her foot down with devastating force, and the ground beneath Lee crumbled. He fell backwards with an expression of surprise. Sakura was going to be able to hit him. Shit. He was dead.

Sakura showed no mercy, and grinned victoriously as she propelled her fist and the last bit of her chakra towards Lee's undefended torso. Just as she was about to make contact, the air shimmered, and Sakura felt Lee's chakra change with a sensation that resembled a rubber band snapping. The next instant, he was gone. Vanished, into thin air. Sakura stumbled forward, and recovered what bit of chakra she could from her wasted punch.

"_Finally,"_ she sighed and smiled as she turned to face Lee, who was standing on the opposite side of the training field in a defensive crouch. He had opened the first chakra gate. There was no visible difference, but Sakura could feel that his chakra had become more intense, more concentrated. He showed no more signs of fatigue, it was as if they hadn't sparred yet at all.

His stance turned offensive, and Sakura prepared to defend herself. He moved to the right, and then vanished again.

"_Fast, the gates-"_ Sakura wasn't able to complete the thought as she felt his presence suddenly within her defenses. She turned to counter the attack with her waning chakra, but it was too late. Sakura's world turned black.

* * *

A/N: Yay! I love Lee. He's too much fun to write! Someone help me! Thanks for the feedback, person who wrote a review. It really helps me make the time to write knowing that someone is waiting to see what happens next. So what happens next!? When do we find out what the hell this story is about!? Let's watch it together!


	5. The Unhurried Banana

**Shinri "Truth"**

* * *

**Chapter Five: The Unhurried Banana**

**Truth - An obvious or accepted fact; truism; platitude.**

* * *

"_Sakura-san!"_

Someone was screaming her name.

"_Sakura-san!" _

Her warm fuzzy mind searched for an identity.

"_Sakura-san! I'm sorry!"_

It was Lee. The world came suddenly back into focus as Sakura's senses and memory returned. Lee was hovering over her, a mortified look of antsy panic dancing across his features. Sakura hadn't been able to defend against the attack in time, and his punch blew right past her defenses, knocking her senseless. She laid on the ground a good dozen feet from where she last remembered standing. His attack still hadn't been as powerful as Sakura's usual punches, but it was enough to send the chakra drained girl flying off for a rendezvous with an unexpected dirt nap.

Lee wrung his hands with worry, still hovering, but being careful to give the potentially pissed off pink haired Shinobi a respectful amount of space, for once.

"I'm okay, Lee-san," she reassured him as she stood and dusted herself off. She had a little bump on the side of her head, nothing serious, and she would be fine by the next morning. Aside from the sheer exhaustion of ineffectually reducing the landscape to a crater, she was none the worse for wear. It had been a good training match, especially since she had gotten to witness firsthand what she had only seen from a distance up until that point.

"Hey, Lee-san," she turned to him cheerfully, interrupting his continued fretting, "Do you have any information about the chakra gates you could share with me? It's really amazing, and could be useful for my medical jutsu if I apply it properly. Would you mind teaching me how to open at least one?"

His eyes turned to saucers. Sakura wasn't sure what he was so shocked about. Maybe it was the fact that she wasn't angry, or maybe the impossible notion that she wanted to hang out with him _more_.

"Absolutely, Sakura-san!" he shouted as he had finally recovered, "I would love nothing more than to teach you all I know!" He paused suddenly, something had him concerned. He rubbed his chin, and stared at the trees. Sakura cocked her head impatiently. What now? He eventually leaned forward towards her, too close for comfort again. She didn't want to be rude and step away, but she still leaned back to put a little more distance between their faces. He held up one finger, as if to make a point.

"There's one problem," he whispered, though there was no one else around. Sakura raised an eyebrow.

"…what…" she wasn't sure she wanted to know.

"Don't tell anyone," he started again, still at a whisper, "it has to be a secret, because Gai-sensei won't let me teach this stuff to anyone."

Sakura, to her surprise, nodded in understanding.

"I could get in trouble," he nodded his head in emphasis as he spoke, "but I'll do it for you… Sakura-chan."

"_Oh, gods. He said __**chan**__. What is he getting at?"_ Sakura began to nod along with Lee without realizing it.

"I understand," she finally spoke, "It'll be our secret." It's not like she wasn't thrilled that their training would be covert. She had hoped as much herself earlier. It was the fact that he was being less… formal, that was freaking her out.

"_No, no, nonono,"_ she chanted in her head, _"NOT a date!"_

Lee rocked back suddenly, and stood erect. He shot her a 'thumbs up', their still close proximity causing the appendage to rest mere inches from Sakura's face.

"Okay then! I'll see you tomorrow…" he turned with vigor and headed towards the exit, "… Sakura-chan!"

"_Does he think our mutual secret makes our…"_ Sakura swallowed the nausea, _"…relationship…ugh, less formal? Does he expect me to call him kun now, or something!?"_

She hung her head in defeat, it better be worth it. With immense effort and a little bit of shame, Sakura reached into the sky, and began to wave, _"Gods, this is immensely useful information, might as well humor him."_

"See you," Sakura called, and Lee looked back at her over his shoulder, "Lee…kun."

It took all of Sakura's willpower to not scream in terror as the biggest shit eating grin she had ever seen erupted on his face.

* * *

Sakura headed straight home after Lee had left. She had been looking forward to sleep since she woke up that morning, but her match with Lee had gotten her blood pumping, and now her mind was wandering over the contents of the Time Scroll. A theory had struck her out of the blue, and she needed urgently to test it, low chakra or not.

Her mother didn't let her walk through the door unnoticed this time, though.

"Sakura-chan, sweetie," her mother popped her head out of the kitchen, "you need to eat more if you're going to keep up your strength! I made you a special dinner."

Sakura felt herself get grabbed by the hand and led into the kitchen. Her mother none too gently pushed Sakura into a seat and deposited a plate piled high with food in front of her. Sakura didn't appreciate the distraction, but she _was_ hungry, so she readily obliged and started clearing the plate.

At one time, Sakura would have only picked at the food. Foolish notions of skinny girls attracting all of the best boys littered her mind then. Now, as a Shinobi and a medic she knew better. Maintaining chakra levels required energy, and energy came from food. With Shisou's training and brand of taijutsu, Sakura needed all of the food she could get. Her peers sometimes rebuked her, told her she would get fat with all of the food she could put away, often out-eating the likes of Chouji. But Tsunade's tough workouts, and the chakra demands of medical jutsu kept Sakura lean. Well muscled, but lean.

In a matter of minutes, the plate was empty. Satisfied, Sakura washed her plate and left the kitchen. Satisfied, her mother let her go without complaint.

* * *

Once again, Sakura felt the urge to just collapse into her soft, welcoming, underused bed. But her curiosity kept her excited about her revelation.

The Time Scroll contained not one, but two similar jutsu. One designed to slow time temporarily, the other designed to stop it entirely. The jutsu were based on perception, and only the person the jutsu was cast on would perceive time differently. It meant that a person could cast the jutsu on themselves to either move more quickly, or move instantly, almost like teleportation. The most curious thing, was that the jutsu was supposed to be harmless to the user, and they would still experience time as they were accustomed. Only, everyone else would be slower, or completely frozen.

Sakura realized that even once she fixed the holes, she would need to test it. But she wasn't brave, or stupid enough, to use herself as her first test subject. With the scrolls a secret, she couldn't ask for volunteers, and wouldn't expect anyone to risk it anyway. Something could go horribly wrong. So how to test something based on perception? She couldn't ask her desk if it was moving faster, or expect her immobile chair to speed up for her.

The solution dawned on her while training with Lee, as her focus had made it seem as if the leaves were falling from the trees more slowly. If she cast the jutsu on something as it fell, if the jutsu worked, the object would fall faster, or appear suddenly further along its path than expected. Now all she needed was something organic, to simulate the human body, so she could determine whether or not the jutsu accidentally liquefied your insides or something equally morbid.

"Don't I have anything organic in here?" she scanned the room quickly. Books, a desk, papers, a very dead house plant, clothes, weapons. It seemed fruitless.

"Wait, that's it!" she scurried over to her pack and pulled out a banana. She had stashed it in there during her hospital shift in case she had a free second for a snack. The moment never came, so the banana had gone uneaten. How lucky.

Sakura painted a focus symbol on the banana as she scanned the scroll for the hand signs needed to perform the jutsu. Certain that she had the sequence memorized, she tossed the banana into the air so it would sail across the room in a wide arc.

"Ninpou, Fukappatsu na Jikoku no Jutsu," she whispered as she kept her eyes peeled on the banana. She executed the fourteen hand seals quickly and perfectly, and, unsure exactly how much chakra the jutsu required, pumped most of what she had left into her focus. The banana reached halfway through its trajectory when Sakura had completed the jutsu. It continued on its path, as if Sakura had been trying to coax it to the ground with words alone, and landed on the wood floor with a dull squishy thud, unhurried by her efforts.

"_Damn,"_ she cursed at the fruit. All she had managed to accomplish was bruise the thing slightly. Frustrated, and too exhausted to care, she left the banana where it lay and flopped into her bed. It was about time she got a good nights sleep anyway.

* * *

Sakura woke to the sound of knocking, not her alarm clock. She sat up, confused. She had fallen asleep in her training clothes, on top of her covers, so she simply hopped out of bed to answer the door.

"_At least I managed to sleep on the bed, though I still need to work on getting in it,"_ she mused as she reached the door. She could tell by the faint chakra that her mother was the one knocking, and, by the lack of light at the window, that it wasn't even 4:00 yet.

"What is it, mom?" Sakura asked as she peeked around the door frame, the annoyance evident in her tone.

"Your grandparents are coming for a visit, I just got the note late last night. They'll be here for breakfast. Just to warn you," her mother continued more sweetly, "Do you think you can dress more nicely and come down earlier, before you go to work? I told them you left early, so they'll be here before you leave, but I also made it clear that your work is important, and takes priority."

Sakura sighed, eyes closed. Her grandparents were not the friendliest or most amicable people, so she wasn't looking forward to it, but at least she had the excuse of work and wouldn't have to tolerate them long. Still, she would have preferred more than one hour of warning.

"Sure, mom, just for you," Sakura had been trying to be nicer to her mother lately, and she failed to disappoint. Her mother nodded and smiled happily before turning back down the stairs to prepare the special breakfast.

Sakura had slept well, but her drained chakra from training had burnt through her dinner. Her stomach groaned loudly, "At least I'll get a nice breakfast out of the deal."

* * *

After her shower, Sakura began to scrounge through her clothes to find something presentable. Most of her clothes were Shinobi oriented. Training clothes, medic aprons, mesh shirts, flexible shorts, sparing gloves, standard issue sandals. Nothing designed for a nice breakfast with the picky extended family. Eventually, Sakura settled on a longer version of her brown utility skirt over black shorts with a simple red top which sported the Haruno clan symbol.

Her Shinobi sandals were too dirty, so she wore her only pair of boots instead. They were calf high, and designed for utility, but at least they were shiny black and clean. She skipped the usual gloves, and set her hitai-ate on her desk. She would just wear the head scarf she used to keep her hair back from before she had graduated from the academy. It was simpler, and less professional, since most of her family didn't approve of her Shinobi status.

"Where is that stupid thing?" She had been looking for the scarf for several minutes, and was getting irritated. It wasn't where she had remembered putting it the day she received her hitai-ate, but she figured it may have gotten moved since then. Her memory served her well, but it just wasn't anywhere to be found. It wasn't in her dresser, in her closet, under her bed-

"Sakura-chan!" her mother called, loudly but demurely, a clear sign that it was 5:00 and her relatives had arrived. Sakura decided to go without tying her long hair back, and simply ran her fingers through it one last time before skipping downstairs with a faked sweet smile.

For all of her effort, she might as well have skipped downstairs in the nude judging by the looks her grandparents gave her. Sakura's mother seemed to agree with her cleaned up appearance, so Sakura ignored the disapproving glares of her elders.

"_Grumpy old farts,"_ she grumbled to herself. Her grandfather, a grey but far from shriveled man, was the head of the Haruno clan, a position that would go unfilled after his death, since Sakura's father had died, and Sakura herself had the misfortune of being born without a dick. Her grandmother, also grey and doing well for her age, stood slightly behind her husband as a sign of submission to his position, though there was nothing submissive about the sour frown which permanently marred her face.

Sakura had heard from her mother that her father was a bright, energetic and loving man. There must have been a mix-up at the hospital on his birthday as his personality bore no resemblance to either of his parents'. Her father, apparently, was also a humble man, which also was unlike his parents, who despite being little more than glorified farmers were dressed to the hilt in expensive silk robes.

"Let us sit for breakfast," was her grandfather's order after Sakura had made her appearance. The three women followed him into the dining room and took their places at the table as they had been told. Sakura's mother had already set out the food for Sakura's sake, so she would have enough time to eat before having to leave at 5:30 to make it to work on time. The grandparents didn't approve.

"_What?"_ Sakura snorted to herself, _"Did they expect us to serve them?"_

Her grandfather picked at his food first, a sign that everyone else at the table had permission to eat. Sakura dug in greedily, still recovering her energy from sparing with Lee.

"You will make yourself ill," her grandmother scolded, "and fat, eating like that."

Sakura nodded to acknowledge that she had heard, but didn't slow her pace.

"She works hard," her mother interjected happily, "So she needs to eat well to keep up her energy." Sakura was grateful for her mother's defending words.

"It is unmannered and unattractive to potential suitors," her grandfather countered, "which brings me to the subject of our sudden visit."

Sakura paused with her chopsticks full and against her lips, _"Suitors?... fuck."_

"As you know, the family is concerned about continuing the name, which is a duty impossible to fulfill at the time. Sakura is the only member of the new generation for the Haruno family, so the name would normally die with her. Luckily, I have arranged a solution to the problem," his disinterest in the food was emphasized by his interest in hearing his own voice. Sakura, too, was suddenly feeling disinterested in her food. It may have been the nausea.

"A well established, but financially declining family has volunteered to join the Haruno clan. It is a rare, but well accepted tradition that a couple may carry the name of the wife's family if the clan is more powerful and the husband's family agrees. It is often a financially wise choice when it is made."

Sakura wanted to flinch at his every word.

"In the Tea Country, a family I often do business with has agreed to the terms, and their eldest son is willing to marry Sakura and take the Haruno name."

If there had been food in her mouth, she would have choked on it. Sakura's mother chanced a worried glance at her increasingly agitated daughter.

"There is one condition," he turned to Sakura and looked her straight in the eye, making it clear that what he was about to say was an order, "He will not marry a kunoichi, so you will resign from your Shinobi rank. Refusal is not an option."

The way he had ordered it had made it clear to Sakura that he felt she wasn't even a decent or worthy Shinobi. That it would be that simple. That her skills weren't needed. She wasn't going to abide it. Her mother looked at her lap, as she wouldn't be able to intervene on Sakura's part this time.

Sakura stood with her fists balled at her sides. Her calm exterior shrouded the verbal beating she was about to dispense to the hapless old man.

Before she could open her mouth, two ANBU materialized next to her. Her grandmother gasped, obviously disgusted by their lack of manners. Sakura wondered how long they had been listening. She recognized their chakra, in spite of their concealed identities, as two of the six ANBU she had worked with recently. Her grandfather was about to dismiss them when one spoke.

"Tsunade-sama requests your presence," the ANBU was a young woman and she addressed Sakura directly. She paused and surveyed the old couple sitting at the table.

"Your shift at the hospital will be covered," Sakura could have sworn she could _feel_ the ANBU grin, "Sakura-_sama_."

"_You are my new best friend,"_ Sakura laughed to herself, turned to her family, bowed, and decided to waste the chakra on 'disappearing' into thin air along with the two ANBU.

Sakura-sama was too important to use doors.

* * *

A/N: Sakura's grandparents are mean, so I can't blame her for her potty mouth. As usual, Lee is fun, I think he's got this whole thing planned. He makes me giggle, so it's okay. "Fukappatsu na Jikoku", the name of the jutsu, lamely means 'slowed time'. Gosh, aren't I original!? Whoo, this one was quick and easy to write for some reason, but it's longer than average. I must be getting excited. I bet the reviews and watchers help. I love you guys. The next chapter is a little more exciting, and then, THE PLOT. I can't wait, can you!?


	6. Categories

**Shinri "Truth"**

* * *

**Chapter Six: Categories**

**Truth - Conformity with fact or reality.**

* * *

The ANBU led Sakura over the rooftops of Konoha at high speed. They were heading towards the Hokage's tower to meet with Tsunade, most likely for a brief on a new mission, but Sakura's mind was elsewhere. Her legs carried her automatically over the familiar path as her mind wandered.

* * *

Her grandparents were becoming more than just irritating benefactors. They were going to ruin her life or her mother's life one way or another. If Sakura refused to marry the suitor her grandparents had selected, she and her mother would no doubt be disowned and no longer be able to make ends meet financially. If Sakura agreed, and did as they wished, she would not only no longer be a Shinobi, she would also be forced to marry someone she had never met, and most likely would not even like. If this merchant from Tea country was liked by her grandparents, then Sakura had no doubt which category of men he went into. The NOT Potential Boyfriend category.

Sakura liked organization. Just as she kept her Shinobi supplies and medical equipment clean and organized, she also kept her mind clean and organized by categorizing everything she saw or experienced. People especially got categorized in Sakura's mind. It made remembering them and interacting with them simpler if she had a set formula based upon their assigned categories.

People at the hospital, for example, were one of three categories; Patient, Patient's Visitor, or Co-worker. People were either Shinobi, or not. People were also either women, or men.

Categories often were sub-categorized as well. Shinobi were either good or evil. Women were one of four; Best Friends, Acquaintances, Not Friends but Not Enemies, or Mother Figures.

Her mother, obviously was Mother Figure number one. Tsunade-shishou had quickly become another mother figure in her life, as had some of the older nurses and doctors at the Hospital.

Ino-pig was in the Best Friends category, and Tenten, while moving up the list, was still in the Acquaintances category. Everyone else, from strangers to people with whom she only had occasional interaction, like her extended family, went in the fourth Not Friends but Not Enemies category.

She had yet to meet a woman who didn't fit a category. Even Ino, while she and Sakura had been rivals, only got moved to the bottom of the fourth category, though Sakura had kept a spot open in the Best Friends category just in case.

Men, like many other things, only needed two categories for Sakura to keep them straight. She had never had much interaction with men as a child since she didn't know her father and had no siblings. Her first real daily interaction with the opposite sex was at the academy, when she was already old enough to decide whether boys were cute or not.

Thus her categories were born; Potential Boyfriend, and NOT Potential Boyfriend.

Anyone unattractive, too old, or too young automatically got dumped into the NOT category. Everyone else, was ranked in order of most to least likely somewhere in the Potential Boyfriend category.

Sasuke, obviously, occupied the top spot on the Potential Boyfriend category for years. Sadly, after he had left, his rank began to slip, but he still hadn't fallen into the NOT category yet.

Naruto, quite the opposite, started on the NOT list for his annoying personality. As Sakura had gotten to know him, however, his rank improved, and as much as Sakura hated to do it, he earned a spot on the Potential Boyfriend list, though firmly at the bottom.

Lee, ugh, was scrambling his way to the top of the NOT list, and if Sakura didn't watch out he might make the leap to the other category, which would not be good.

Even people like Iruka-sensei and some other Chuunin and Jounin Shinobi made it to the Potential Boyfriend category. Not because Sakura had any intention of asking them out, but because they were attractive or nice enough, and not _too_ old.

In the end it was just a category in her mind, a way for her to stay organized, not a way for her to pursue a potential husband, as Sakura was becoming more and more certain she would remain single for the rest of life. Grandparents be damned.

But even her categories could be defied once in a while. There was one man in Sakura's life that she just couldn't fit into one of the two categories. He floated about in the no-man's land of her mind, cluttering the place up, and it irked her.

* * *

The run to the Hokage's office had been quick, especially since Sakura had been lost in her own thoughts. The ANBU led her quickly up the stairs of the Hokage's Tower. Sakura was still distracted, and didn't bother scanning for familiar chakra as they approached Tsunade's office.

She was just setting aside her pondering as she and the ANBU entered, and Sakura found herself face to face with the man that had defied her categories.

"Kakashi-sensei!" Sakura greeted and gave him a genuine smile. It had been a long time since she had seen him, since he was always off on some mission or another. Maybe, this time, she would be going on a mission with him.

She was happy to see him, she always was. She was a little surprised though, to see him actually early for a meeting for once. Or maybe Sakura was just _that_ late.

He held up a hand, and she could tell he was smiling, "Yo."

His simple gesture was enough to make Sakura smile again, but there was no time for small talk.

Tsunade, from her position behind her disaster area of a desk called the small group of Shinobi to attention, "A new development in a recent relief mission has surfaced, and I have scrambled you all together for an immediate departure A-rank mission."

Sakura was fairly sure the relief mission was the one she had returned from only a few days ago. She glanced around the room and found that the mission would include her two ANBU escorts, Kakashi-sensei, and someone that made her blood curdle a little. Morino Ibiki, the interrogation expert. Interrogation? What did that have to do with the relief mission?

"Thanks to Sakura's extensive medical reports that she left with the new leader of the village that we suspect was attacked by Akatsuki, he was able to identify a man who was not a villager before the attack," Tsunade shuffled some papers and pulled out a dirty piece of parchment.

"He sent word of his suspicion the day after you had departed, and a few days later confirmed that the man was not treated for any injuries during the relief mission. He suspects that the man is an Akatsuki plant, and that whatever it is that they are after, they haven't gotten it yet. He has wisely remained passive, and pretended to buy the man's alibi, so that we may have a chance to capture and interrogate him."

Tsunade nodded in Ibiki's direction, "You will be undercover as ANBU for this mission. I want to make sure this man slips up if he is working for Akatsuki. See what kind of information you can get out of him before he even realizes that we are returning to the village to capture him."

The Hokage pulled out a small envelope and handed it to Kakashi, "We are using the guise of continued relief as an excuse to return to the village. That envelope contains money that we budgeted from the mission fee that the Daimyo is paying for the capture of the Akatsuki spy. Give it to the new village leader to help them pay for the rebuilding efforts. Some food will also be sent along with you for the villagers."

Sakura was last, and Tsunade handed her a copy of the message the village leader had sent, "Sakura, you will be providing follow up medical attention, but your primary mission is to confirm the identity of the spy. Since you had direct contact with each of the villagers, you will be the most likely to recognize which of them doesn't belong. You can also confirm that he wasn't wounded during the attack, which would place him under further suspicion."

Sakura nodded, hiding her hesitance. She was being sent back there. It hadn't been much more than a week since she left the village, and Sakura wasn't sure she could handle a return visit so soon. She was only just getting over what she had seen, and the mere thought of returning made her throat constrict and her eyes water. She could still smell it.

"Use extreme caution while dealing with the suspect," Tsunade gave her last instructions, "If he turns out to be associated with Akatsuki, or Gods forbid, a member, he will be extremely powerful. Don't, under any circumstances, underestimate him. Fight as a last resort, the capture needs to be as covert as possible to avoid drawing attention or harming the villagers. You leave in thirty minutes, dismissed."

Sakura mimicked her teammates by nodding curtly and vanishing to gather her things.

* * *

There wasn't much time for Sakura to dwell on her thoughts or fears about the mission, especially since she had a stop to make before joining her team at the main gates. She bolted through her house, grabbed her already packed supplies, slammed back the last of her cold breakfast, and ran towards training field two. She hadn't even bothered to change her clothes. Her mother wasn't home either, as she most likely was kidnapped by her grandparents after Sakura had made her hasty exit. She felt a little guilty at the thought of her mother being harassed or threatened by her family-in-law over Sakura's eminent marriage or disownment. Sakura couldn't dwell though, she had reached the training fields in record time. She needed to find Lee.

As she suspected, he was training with the rest of his team at the far end of field two. She didn't have time to waste, so she ran right up to him.

Everyone turned to give Sakura their unique expressions of bewilderment as she called out, "Lee-kun! I need to talk to you for a second!"

Lee stopped in mid kick, the only bit of mercy the training log had encountered in several hours, and turned to Sakura, beaming.

"Sakura-chan!" Tenten's and Neji's bewilderment grew as Lee turned to greet her, "Absolutely! To what do I owe this spontaneous and delightful visit?!"

Sakura ignored the looks the two Shinobi were giving her from a distance and cut to the chase, "I'm leaving in a few minutes for an emergency mission, I just wanted to let you know so you wouldn't wonder where I was."

Lee continued to grin as he reached into the pack at his side, "Then I will have to give you your gift now, so you can enjoy it sooner! Your enthusiasm inspired me to create this! Even the dead of night could not thwart me!"

He held out a small journal and placed it gently in Sakura's hands. She turned it over and scanned the first page. It was information on the eight chakra gates. He had hand written everything he knew, since no published book or scroll existed for the forbidden jutsu.

"Thank you," Sakura was a little shocked. He was running quite the risk, writing the technique down was bad enough, sharing it was even worse, and he did it all willingly for her. Her NOT list had just become a little shorter. She couldn't help it.

Sakura leapt forward and hugged Lee with enough force to knock him backwards a few steps. She really was nuts.

His face immediately burned bright red and his eyes looked like they would fly out of his head if they hadn't been attached.

Sakura returned to her senses and backed away, "Shit! I'm going to be late!"

She turned suddenly and ran back towards the main gate. Before she faded from sight she turned and waved to Lee, "I'll let you know as soon as I get back!"

There were several minutes of stunned silence before the three Shinobi were able to resume their training.

* * *

When Sakura arrived, she was relieved to find that she wasn't the only late one. Only the three ANBU had gathered, one of which was obviously Ibiki. The man was too tall and distinguishable for anyone who had ever met him to fall for the disguise. His face was covered, but his aura was not. Sakura shivered a little.

Kakashi hadn't arrived yet. Typical. Sakura took the opportunity to read the village leader's message. It was hurried, and brief. It included the alias information the suspected spy had provided, and a brief, but very general description of the man. Black hair, brown eyes, average height. He wasn't exactly a sore thumb, but Sakura supposed that was the point.

Several minutes after the departure time, early by Kakashi standards, the Copy Ninja himself strode nonchalantly into view. No one reprimanded him, but Sakura rolled her eyes a little.

"Everyone ready?" he asked, as if he had been the one waiting for them. Sakura huffed a little, and he responded with one of his characteristic eye smiles. Kakashi led the way, and the small group exited through the gates. They leapt into the trees silently and ran at top speed towards the northern village.

* * *

During the first mission, the team had ran, but they had also taken occasional breaks. This time, the running was constant, and grueling. Sakura was having trouble keeping up the pace from the beginning, but she would be damned if she was going to show any weakness, especially in front of Kakashi.

After two days of top speed running, they were already nearing the village. Kakashi stopped suddenly and the team waited in the trees behind him. The village had planned on sending someone to meet them to confirm that the suspected spy was still there and fill them in on any new developments. Everyone took the opportunity to rest and eat a little while Kakashi strolled through the woods, waiting for their contact.

Sakura soon recognized the surroundings, which meant that they were less than an hour outside of the town. The wind was blowing strong enough from the direction of the village that Sakura could already smell it. She was delighted. It still smelled of earth and a little of soot, but it also smelled of freshly cut wood, and there was no stench of death. They had already begun rebuilding.

Several minutes after Kakashi had wandered off, he returned, but alone.

"No contact yet," he confirmed, "Just rest up for now, no need to conceal your chakra, we're just a relief mission after all."

He took a seat against a tree trunk near where Sakura was sitting and took out his book to read.

"_Pervert,"_ Sakura grumbled to herself, even though somehow he made that flaw an endearing quality. She wouldn't have him any other way.

As she watched him read, she distracted herself from her apprehension of the mission by trying again to categorize him. When she first met him, it was easy. He was most definitely in the NOT category. He was weird, a little mean, and his silver hair made her assume that he was old, at least in his forties.

He grew on her though, and it turned out that he wasn't so mean, and he was weird, but it wasn't so bad. Her medical training had given her the ability to guess at what his mask hid, and that combined with rumors told her that he was far from unattractive.

The kicker was when she found out that when she had first met him he was just in his mid twenties. Now she wasn't so sure. He met the standards for the Potential Boyfriend list, but he was her Sensei. That didn't disqualify Iruka-sensei, but Kakashi-sensei was different, right? Or maybe not? She just didn't know.

The three ANBU walked off together towards a nearby stream to refill their canteens. Sakura took the opportunity to share something else that had been bothering her with Kakashi. She hated to admit it, but she was far from distracted from her fear. This time, they were most likely going to encounter Akatsuki, at least a spy of theirs, and Sakura still wasn't confident enough in her abilities as a fighter. She was an excellent medic, she owned that much now, but she had no illusions about her faults either.

"Kakashi-sensei?" he looked up from his book grunted in acknowledgement, "Can I ask you a favor?"

It seemed like a silly question, but Sakura wanted to make sure he knew how she felt about the mission, and that he didn't tell the ANBU. She was still reluctant to return to the village, because even if it was being physically rebuilt, the people would still be broken. She didn't want to look at their empty faces.

He looked a little confused but after a few seconds he eye-smiled, "Sure, Sakura-chan, anything."

"Anything?" she considered his statement, and he nodded in confirmation.

"Anything."

He said he'd do anything. Anything. Any favor, anything she needed. He would be there. The word tumbled through her thoughts and after a few seconds, she smiled.

"Thanks, Kakashi-sensei," he looked a little confused, "That's all I needed to know."

"Sakura," his tone turned serious at her cryptic statement.

In his concern he had folded his book in his lap, "What's bothering you?"

She glanced at him in shock. Was she being that obvious? She shifted uncomfortably. He had just said he would do anything for her, so there was no point in hiding from him. She could trust him, right?

"I… I just," Sakura took an unsteady breath, "I don't want to go back to that village."

Silence.

Eventually, Kakashi nodded in understanding, "I know, I wasn't on the first mission, but I heard from several people what the conditions were like. I've seen similar destruction myself, so I can sympathize."

He paused as Sakura fiddled with the edge of her medic skirt nervously.

"I also heard," he continued, "that you handled yourself very professionally, and likely saved many lives."

"It's a lie," Sakura spat suddenly, angry at herself, "I was an emotional wreck, I was just hiding it well. I cried… when I got home." She finished softly, ashamed of her confession of weakness.

"Everyone is," Kakashi sighed, "Everyone does." Sakura looked up at him, his expression had become more somber. He looked like he was lost in memory.

"No one can completely detach themselves from their humanity," he was speaking gently, "We aren't really expected to, even as Shinobi. As long as we don't let it interfere with our jobs, it's okay to still be… human."

Sakura was nodding at his words, and appreciating how genuine he was being with her.

"I've cried too, many times," Sakura's eyes widened in disbelief at his words, "I wait until I'm alone to let it show, but I can be an emotional wreck sometimes too."

"One time," he let out a dry chuckle, "After a mission, I made it home, but couldn't even make it to the couch. I cried myself to sleep right there on the living room floor."

Just like Sakura had.

"What mission?" Sakura couldn't help her curiosity as she related to his story.

His gaze wandered to the ground. Eventually, he spoke a single word.

"Haku."

Sakura understood. She had cried then too, for more than one reason, and she hadn't waited to go home. She shamelessly cried in front of people, because she hadn't built her emotional mask yet.

Kakashi picked up his book, no doubt intent on returning to reading, but Sakura had other ideas. She scooted over to him until she was sitting knee to knee right in front of him.

"Everyone?" she asked after he hadn't put his book back down.

He sighed resignedly. He didn't look up from his book as he spoke, "Everyone. All Shinobi have their own coping mechanisms, their own way of toughening their skin, so their emotions don't leak out at inopportune moments… Everyone."

"But," he continued before Sakura could leave, "Everyone still has emotions lurking just under that skin, no matter how tough. It just takes more for some people to show theirs. That toughness comes with experience, and will power. And you have some mighty will power, Sakura. I'm very proud of you."

Sakura had just figured out which category Kakashi-sensei belonged in. She leaned forward and hugged him gently. His arms flew outwards at the contact, as if she was on fire and he was trying to avoid touching her.

"Thank you," she whispered, but before she pulled away she added, "I love you, Kakashi-sensei."

His breath hitched, and he hiccupped a little. He had always been protective and supportive of his students, but, love? It was all a little too odd, but he didn't want to hurt her feelings, and he could feel the chakra of the ANBU and Ibiki returning. It would not be fun trying to explain what they were about to walk into.

"Uh…yeah…. Love you too," he gently patted her shoulder with one hand, and after few seconds she pulled back, smiling. He smiled back, though mostly out of relief, and she returned to her spot a few feet away.

Sakura liked organization. Just as she kept her Shinobi supplies and medical equipment clean and organized, she also kept her mind clean and organized by categorizing everything she saw or experienced. Men went under one of two categories; Potential Boyfriends, and NOT Potential Boyfriends.

But now she had a third category; Father Figures. Her first entry; Hatake Kakashi.

* * *

A/N: This chapter gave me writers block for a while. I decided to focus on emotions and relationships more in this chapter than action and plot for reasons that will become more obvious in later chapters, and in the second and third parts of the story. Also, the story went from 11 chapters to 12 because I added some stuff. Yay! Stuff! Thanks again to my reviewers and watchers, I'm glad you like it so far!


	7. Musings on Monsters

**Shinri "Truth"**

* * *

**Chapter Seven: Musings on Monsters**

**Truth – Verity, the truth of a statement.**

* * *

The group of Konoha Shinobi hadn't been resting long when the village contact Kakashi had been expecting strolled into the makeshift camp area. Sakura recognized him immediately. She had treated his broken collar bone and minor abrasions. The elderly man nodded politely to the group, then sat calmly across from Kakashi.

"He's still there," the man spoke casually, as if discussing the weather, "Helping raise the second floor of my niece's house. Nice young man."

Kakashi grunted in acknowledgement as he stood, "Better go help out some, then."

He reached down to the old man, offering his hand to help him stand. The villager smiled, but shrugged off the help and got unsteadily to his feet on his own. Sakura had expected the gesture would cause some tension, but Kakashi didn't seem to mind as he trailed behind the man who had begun walking back to the village. The rest of the team followed suit and fell into place behind Kakashi.

* * *

The snail's pace through the thick woods didn't soothe Sakura's frayed nerves. She refused to allow her mind to wander, convinced she would only dream up worse case scenarios which could distract her from the real situation. Her slightly furrowed brow was the only indication of her distress, which none of her fellow Shinobi seemed to notice.

After several hours of unhurried hiking, the tree line finally broke. Sakura surveyed the village, trying her best to look professional and unmoved. The landscape was still recovering, and the edge of the forest was still a rough and tangled mess, but the village was doing much better. The larger portion of the debris had been cleared, leaving behind only the useful and salvageable pieces for rebuilding. A handful of small buildings had been completed, and were serving as the living quarters for the majority of the villagers. Several dozen more houses were in progress, and the villagers were all cooperating to finish the homes as quickly as possible.

Everyone was so busy, in fact, that no one took notice of the Shinobi's arrival. The old man continued into the village, leaving the Konoha nin to wait at the edge of the town.

"Hey!" he called out to a group of men laying mortar on a nearly complete house, "Our help's arrived!"

One man, the one Sakura had assumed would become the leader of the village after their last mission, stopped his work and looked up. He walked over to the group, dusting off his hands on his pants as he went. Kakashi reached out a hand, and the village leader shook it enthusiastically. With his other hand, Kakashi delivered the envelope of relief money. The villager smiled.

"Glad you could make it," he gestured towards the ongoing effort, "Feel free to jump on in where you're needed."

"If you don't mind," Sakura interrupted before he could return to work, "I'd like to do one round of check ups, to make sure everyone healed properly."

"That sounds like a great idea. Why don't you start over at that two story house? There's a young man there who pulled a muscle earlier today, could probably use some mending," the village leader pointed out a nearby building, where their aging contact was now talking to a pretty young woman. Sakura recognized the young woman as the one who had lost her infant.

On the second floor, several men were securing the wooden framework for the walls, and one dark haired man was eying the group of Shinobi, momentarily distracted from his work. His left arm was in a home made sling, but he looked otherwise unscathed. Sakura made eye contact with him, and, to her surprise, he smiled, and waved. She didn't expect him to do that, because she didn't recognize him.

Sakura swallowed back a lump of hesitation that had caught in her throat when she spotted him. It was now or never, and what a perfect opportunity. She didn't need to communicate her confirmation to her team. She knew what needed to be done, and that it needed to be done quietly and without alarming the villagers. Sakura excused herself from the village leader, and strolled happily over to the waiting man.

"Are you the medic?" he clambered down to the ground and asked cheerfully when she approached.

Sakura nodded sweetly as the young man began to ramble, "They said a medic would be coming soon, when I hurt my arm, so I didn't need to worry. I feel so useless right now, trying to build houses one handed isn't very easy."

"I suppose it wouldn't be," she smiled and began to prepare her medic kit on the ground next to the building. The man sat down next to her, waiting patiently for his treatment.

In the meantime, the rest of the Konoha Shinobi had begun helping with the reconstruction efforts, and were scattered across the tiny town. Sakura noticed Ibiki in his ANBU getup within view, though he was pretending not to notice the conversation as he lifted some huge boulders into place.

"It seems like you wouldn't have needed to worry much anyway," Sakura reassured the injured man as she examined his now exposed arm, "It's just a minor tear, it will probably heal on its own."

"Oh, good!" he cheered happily and his entire face lit up. His enthusiasm reminded Sakura ever so slightly of Naruto. She couldn't help but let a genuine smile creep past her lips.

"I moved here recently, and then this happened," he looked sad for an instant, and Sakura couldn't help but notice that the spark had left his eyes, "I don't have any family here, and not much to loose, so I feel like I owe it to the other villagers, who lost so much, to at least help out as much as I can."

"_Owe them? You probably helped cause this,"_ Sakura hissed to herself, though the gregarious man's demeanor had drained most of the venom from her thoughts. He didn't seem at all like the monster she had expected. She entertained the possibility that he had been falsely accused, but it was up to Ibiki to discover the truth, not her.

Sakura rummaged around in her pack and pulled out a small tube of ointment, "This will help ease the pain for now, but don't use your arm just yet. When I finish my rounds, I'll use a jutsu to heal you completely. I want to save my chakra, in case I have an emergency, but if all goes well, you'll be back to work in no time."

The young man nodded enthusiastically as Sakura rubbed the cream over the torn muscle with gloved hands. She continued her instructions, in full on medic mode, "I recommend you take it easy until I come back, since one of the side effects of the pain ointment is drowsiness."

"Really?" he groaned, "I have to sit around? People need help, isn't there something I can do, maybe something like laying stone, or digging holes?"

Sakura shook her head sternly, "No, no work. Don't worry, it's not going anywhere, you'll be more useful sooner if you take it easy for right now."

Eventually, though with a pout, the young man relented, and walked, a little shakily, over to the edge of the woods to nap under a tree. Sakura took off her gloves with relief, carefully avoiding touching the outside surface, where some residue of the cream likely lingered.

In a matter of minutes, the dark haired young man was unconscious in the shade of the tree, blissfully unaware of his predicament. Sakura reported to Kakashi that she had drugged their suspect, and that he would be out napping long enough for the team to finish helping, preventing raised suspicions among the villagers.

By nightfall, the town was quiet as most people had retreated to their newly built homes. The village leader and the Konoha Shinobi gathered around the snoozing form of the suspected Akatsuki spy.

"I'll tell them he went back to his home town to be with his family," the village leader confirmed. He didn't want anyone worrying about Akatsuki when they should be focusing on rebuilding.

Sakura didn't like the idea of deceiving the villagers, especially when it came to potential dangers, but she held her tongue. She also hid her growing guilt over the possibility that he wasn't a spy, since she had no authority in the matter.

Ibiki easily scooped the smaller man up and slung him unceremoniously over one shoulder as he readied to depart. Kakashi gave the signal, and the group disappeared into the dark woods.

* * *

Much to Sakura's dismay, the return trip was just as hurried and exhausting as their departure. Thanks to her drug, at least it was uneventful. It wasn't until the group was so near to Konaha that Sakura could swear she could hear the bustling streets that their unconscious charge suddenly leapt off of Ibiki's shoulder and landed shakily in a nearby clearing. He must have had an unusually strong constitution, since Sakura's drug wasn't supposed to wear off for another day. As the ANBU and Kakashi surrounded the man, Sakura could tell that while he was conscious, the drug hadn't fully worn off. He was disoriented and clumsy, and his balance was so poor that he was having difficulty simply standing.

"Whuuuuu…?" the man slurred as a small rivulet of drool escaped from the corner of his mouth.

The Konoha Shinobi held their ground, hoping he would fall over or loose consciousness again and they could avoid conflict.

Realization seemed to dawn on the man suddenly and he groaned, "Gaaws, Saowi-sama's gunna pe soooo maaaa ah me…"

He gripped his head in both hands and rubbed vigorously in an attempt to clear his fuzzy vision.

"Leader's gonna kill me," he grumbled into his hands, his speech noticeably less slurred, as if his latest thought had sobered him dramatically.

Without warning, he threw himself in Sakura's direction, with speed and grace she had considered impossible in his state. He had no weapons drawn, and Sakura could tell he was only trying to avoid the ANBU and Jounin. He assumed she was just a medic, and he would be able to escape through the gap in their circle, right past her.

Sakura's eyes grew wide, and she tucked her hands under her chin nervously. The other Shinobi wouldn't be able to stop him. Even drugged, he was much faster than any of them. His vision focused on the forest beyond Sakura, to his freedom.

Suddenly, his throat contacted something rock solid and immovable. Sakura's arm. His feet flew forwards from the force of his own momentum and the next instant his back slammed into the ground. If the strike to his throat hadn't knocked the wind out of him, the sudden collision with rocky earth had. Sakura followed through the motion, planting him in a miniature crater. Before the dust could settle she pulled out a vial of sedative and jabbed it into his arm. He was unconscious before the ANBU and Kakashi had gathered.

"_Clothes lined!"_ Sakura cheered to herself. Her nervous act had fooled him, luckily, but it was a gamble. She didn't have a plan 'B' if he had noticed in time, or simply been too strong to knock out so easily. Sakura noticed the other Shinobi seemed to be gawking at her a little, a sensation she could feel even through their masks.

"Good work," Ibiki commented dryly as he scooped the man up again. It was by far the most positive reinforcement Sakura had ever heard out of the man's mouth. Ever.

Kakashi walked over and placed a hand on her head, "That's my student."

Sakura snorted, "You mean Tsunade-sama's student." She ducked out from under his hand playfully.

He eye smiled at her, "You were mine first."

* * *

When they finally arrived at Konoha's gates later that morning, the ANBU and Kakashi disappeared with their abducted charge after a brief mission summary. Kakashi had told Sakura to go home and relax, and that she would be called if she was needed.

It was nearly lunch time, so Sakura had decided to take Kakashi's advice and relax a bit, though most people wouldn't consider hanging out with Ino relaxing. She didn't bother stopping home first, though she would have loved a nice shower and a change of clothes. Sakura was also concerned about what had happened with her mother and her grandparents, though she was confident her stubborn mother could handle herself. Food was forefront on Sakura's mind, and she hadn't seen her friends in almost a week. The shower and the in-laws could wait.

Sakura entered the café and scanned for her friends. As sure as the sun would rise and set every day, her three friends were gathered around their usual table, already eating and listening to Ino talk.

"Forehead!" Ino practically screamed when she finally noticed the pink haired kunoichi walking over to the table. The handful of other patrons in the small café grumbled a little at the hyper girl's outburst.

"Hey, pig," Sakura greeted as she sat in her chair. Before she could order, Sakura felt a strange aura fill the space. Ino and Tenten were eying her slyly, and Hinata was looking especially…nervous?

"What's up?" Sakura tried to break the mood, and Tenten snorted.

"What do you mean 'what's up?'" she pushed back from the table skeptically, "You and Lee-kun, that's what's up. Or are you just afflicted with a hugging disease?"

"Oh, gods," Sakura groaned and tried miserably to hide behind the menu, "It's not like that! We're just friends."

Ino rolled her eyes at Sakura's assertion, "Right… then why don't you hug _me_ like that?"

"Please!" Sakura hissed, glaring around the menu at Ino, "I hate you half the time!"

Hinata giggled a little. Everyone turned, distracted by the usually silent girl's behavior.

She was blushing as she spoke softly, "It's okay, Sakura-chan, you can like whoever you want. Don't let anyone stop you."

Sakura gaped openly for a second, "I... but… Thanks Hinata, but it _really_ isn't like that."

Ino and Tenten were both nodding. Sakura raised an eyebrow at them, confused.

"Okay, forehead, I buy your end, you don't have the hots for Eyebrows, but here's the problem," Ino pointed at Tenten so she could finish.

"He's convinced you two are dating now," Tenten crossed her arms like she usually did when she thought she was right, "And he's telling everyone about his awesome girlfriend, though he is at least being considerate enough to leave out your name."

"Shit," Sakura hid behind her menu again, "Shit, shit_shit_."

She really should have just gone home for a shower. Shit. Sakura was startled out of her cussing spree by a presence beside the table. It wasn't the waitress like she had hoped, but the female ANBU she had been working with lately.

"Tsunade-sama requests your presence in her office," she relayed the message dryly and vanished.

Sakura groaned an apology to her friends and her complaining stomach as she hurried out of the café and towards the Hokage's Tower.

* * *

When Sakura reached Tsunade's office, she noticed immediately that it was empty, and the door was ajar. Sakura invited herself in, and found the office to be in its usual state of disarray. Confident that her Shishou would return shortly, Sakura strolled up to the desk to sit in one of the nearby chairs. Her eyes drifted lazily over the piles of scrolls and files scattered across the Hokage's desk, and before she could sit, one caught her eye.

It was a confidential file on Akatsuki, but the odd thing was, that another file was inside of it, slipping past the edges just far enough for Sakura to see one word; ANBU.

"What is an ANBU personnel file doing in a file on the Akatsuki?" Sakura wondered quietly, and after a brief check around the still empty room, decided to take a risk and peek. She flipped the pages open, and gasped aloud at what she saw.

Sasuke, no it wasn't Sasuke, but he certainly resembled him, stared emotionlessly back at her from the mug shot on the first page of the file. She read the name; Uchiha Itachi. A relative of Sasuke's? His brother. She read more hurriedly. Academy graduation at seven years old. Chuunin at ten. ANBU Captain at thirteen. Genius.

"_He's younger than I am now in this picture,"_ Sakura handled the paper gently, cautiously, _"He looks so old, tired. His expression is so hollow, like some of the people at that village."_

Sakura checked her surroundings again, and confident that she was still alone, she turned the page. Massacre. He had murdered his own clan? Only Sasuke survived. Was this the source of his revenge? Things started to connect in Sakura's mind, and she read on.

The next page, his bingo file. Joined Akatsuki, largely unseen, attacked the village a few years back. That's when Kakashi-sensei had been hospitalized. What was he after? After being hidden so long? Powerful, and feared. Sharingan. A true monster. Sakura wondered what could turn such a promising boy into such a cruel person. Someone once trusted with the protection of the village was now one of its biggest threats.

She turned the pages back to the first, and looked at the picture again. He surely looked a little like Sasuke at first glance, but they looked very different too. His expression was haunting, and Sakura knew it wasn't just a crappy mug shot that made him look that way.

"_He was a monster before anyone even realized it,"_ she mused, _"What did that to him? Was he born that way?"_

Sakura found herself a little mesmerized by the photograph, still in awe that someone his age could look so old, not in feature, but in aura. He looked like a child, who had seen it all.

"_The war,"_ it dawned on Sakura as she reconsidered his age. He couldn't have been more than five years old during the last war, the same war that had claimed Sakura's father. Itachi was born after it started, and he lived through it for his most tender years. What horrible things did he witness in that war? He was just like the children who had survived the attack on the village, only worse. He may have physically survived the war, but his soul was dead. His eyes told her that.

Was he one of the Akatsuki who attacked the village? Did he do it based only on orders, or was it the unhappy fate of children who survived such trauma to perpetuate more of it? For an instant, Sakura felt a flicker of sympathy, but it was quickly snuffed out by anger.

It was too late, he was already gone. A monster who hurt the village, who hurt Sasuke. A monster who threatened the village, and who took Sasuke away from her. He was just as responsible as Orochimaru. Sakura hoped that whatever information they could get from the spy, it would lead to this man's capture. Maybe even his death. They would be putting him out of his misery.

Sakura pushed the file aside to the one underneath it.

"Hoshigaki Kisame…" she only had time to read the name as the chakra of her Shisou approached from the hall. Sakura sat in the still waiting chair smoothly, and looked as if she had been waiting patiently as Tsunade strode into the room.

"Ah, Sakura, good," Tsunade patted her student on the shoulder on her way to the desk, "I have one last duty for you before closing this mission."

Sakura nodded, grateful that Tsunade hadn't noticed anything out of place on her disastrous desk.

"Thanks to you and your sedative, Ibiki has been able to confirm that the man you captured is working for Akatsuki as a spy, and we have a name of a member of Akatsuki we had previously been unaware of. However, he is no amateur, and after his first slip, he realized his mistake and has since clammed up. Ibiki hasn't been able to crack him using verbal and psychological means alone, so..." Tsunade folded her hands and looked, almost shamefully, at her desk.

"We are going to have to take the interrogation…to… the next level," she chose her words carefully, hoping Sakura would understand her meaning.

Sakura's eyes grew wide, _"Torture?! Well, he is a monster, if he's working for Akatsuki, right? He hurt those people, he deserves it!"_

Her internal struggle was interrupted by Tsunade's now softer voice, "If the first round of interrogation doesn't go well, I've assigned you as the medic. If the second round doesn't do the trick, well… then we'd be wasting our time. Can you do this Sakura?"

Sakura nodded. She could do it. Just walk in, heal his wounds, walk out. Easy.

* * *

Easy? Right. Sakura kept having to regain her focus as she was led to the interrogation room by no other than Ibiki himself.

"There's been another attack, south west in the River Country," Ibiki tried his hand at casual conversation as he led Sakura down the decidedly creep halls, "So, you're helping out more than just Konoha with this. Intel pins the more recent attack on Akatsuki too, so if we can find out what they are after from this guy, the next attack can be stopped."

Sakura just gulped and nodded as he spoke. He wasn't very good at being comforting, but at least he wasn't as cold or utterly frightening as before.

"Don't talk to him too much, but if he talks, let us know, we'll be recording what he says just in case." Ibiki stopped at a large metal door and easily pushed it aside, leaving just enough space for Sakura to slip into the room with her medic kit. The heavy metal door crashed closed behind her.

In the middle of the red-toned room, illuminated by a single dim light, was a chair. The dark haired young man was tied securely with chakra infused ropes, and he slouched forward, straining the ropes against his chest. He was bloodied, and small pools of blood had begun to accumulate around the chair. He lifted his head weakly at the sound of the crashing door.

When he spotted Sakura, frozen to her spot, he smiled.

"Hey, you," his voice was tired and weak as he greeted Sakura cheerfully, "At least they let me see someone pretty before the end."

He cough-laughed a little at his own joke. Sakura willed her legs into carrying her over to stand beside the chair, so she could start her work, and get out of there as soon as possible. A confusing jumble of emotions aggravated by her recent revelations about Sasuke and the Akatsuki were driving her mad.

"I'm going to heal you," she tried to sound professional, but her voice was a sad whimper. He nodded as much as his state would let him.

"I know," he sounded resigned, as if he had accepted his fate, "They gotta try one more crack at me before they give up. It's okay. I get it. I knew something like this could happen when I took this job."

"_Why is he so talkative? Is he opening up to me or something? Or trying to catch me off guard? I won't fall for his charms, not since we confirmed his affiliation with those monsters,"_ Sakura stiffened her jaw as she prepared her medical supplies. She pulled her hair back into her usual sloppy bun and set to work.

"You know," he began again, lazily, as it looked like Sakura would be working for a while, "That was pretty clever, with that cream stuff. I had no idea you were on to me, I must be a pretty shitty spy. You're pretty tough, too, you know that? Took me out like nothing."

Sakura didn't respond to his flattery, convinced he was just trying to get under her skin.

"I have a sister," his voice was softer as he spoke, "You remind me of her a bit. Gorgeous, and sweet, but can kick serious ass, you know? Bet you have to fight the boys off just like her too, huh?"

He laughed out loud at a memory he didn't have the chance to share, as his laughter became harsh and he began coughing up blood. Sakura, out of instinct, raised a hand to his neck to ease the hacking with her chakra.

"You're full of crap, and wasting your breath," Sakura scolded, finally calm enough from the task at hand to slip into medic mode.

"Does your _sweet_ sister know you work for murderous monsters?" she finally retorted after his coughing had subsided.

"Monsters?" he considered the word quizzically, as if he had never heard if before.

His voice was rougher and raspy from his fit of coughing, "I don't work for monsters any more than you do. In fact, I'd say you've had more contact with real and actual monsters than you care to realize."

Sakura scoffed, but was too distracted by some sudden bleeding to respond. She quickened her pace, just doing enough to stabilize him, not healing him completely.

"I suppose it won't be betrayal to tell you this, since your superiors already know this much," he was whispering, and Sakura couldn't help but lean in to listen a little, even as she fiddled with a bandage.

"You know what a bijuu is, right? This place was attacked by one when you were probably just a baby, if born at all, the nine tails, the fox one. You know what they did with it?"

Sakura had stopped working, and was listening intently now.

"Yes…It was defeated, by the Yondaime, he saved the village," she responded, almost automatically.

He nodded, "Yes, but where is it? You can't kill something like that. It has to be sealed away. Konoha and several other villages tried to 'tame' the bijuu by sealing them inside children, so they could use them as weapons."

Sakura gasped aloud in utter shock. She knew some places were capable of it, like what had happened to Gaara. But surely not Konoha!

He snorted a little, "and you think _who's_ the monster?"

Sakura was unconsciously shaking her head in disbelief.

"Akatsuki is capturing the bijuu," his voice had regained some strength, and the sense of pride was obvious. He paused as he sensed Sakura's confusion, though she was just behind him and out of his field of view.

"What was the name of the Konoha kid with the kuubi? Oh, that's it. Uzumaki. Anyone familiar?"

Sakura grabbed her medical supplies and ran for the steel door. Ibiki opened it as he felt her coming.

"He's stable," she choked out before he could speak. She didn't wait for a response or an escort as she ran as fast as her legs could carry her out of that horrible place.

* * *

A/N: Geeze, that's a long chapter! It's up a little later than I had hoped, since I got sick, but I'm feeling better now. PLOT BUNNIEZ! Aren't they cute?! Wow, she found out about Sasuke's issues and Naruto's issues all in one day. Shitty day. I hope tomorrow is better for Sakura, she works so hard, how about a nice happy day off? I wish I could have more Hinata, she's actually one of my favorites, at least she talked a little in this chapter. Thanks again for the reviews and watches! You make me NOT lazy!


	8. It's a Sunny Day

**Shinri "Truth"**

* * *

**Chapter Eight: It's a Sunny Day**

**Truth - A verified or indisputable fact, proposition, or principle.**

* * *

Sakura ran. Her exhausted legs burned with the effort, but she refused to stop. If she ran fast enough, perhaps she could outrun the pain, outrun the fear. Naruto. Naruto was in danger, he always had been. Why hadn't anyone told her? Why hadn't anyone trusted her to help him? She had been training so hard for years, and she still couldn't protect him. Maybe she never would. Maybe she would lose him someday too, just like she had lost Sasuke.

When she burst out of the prison building and into the sunlight, Sakura finally stopped. It was past midday, but the sun was still blinding and obstructed her view as she stared up at the Hokage's tower across the dirt clearing. She had been instructed to report back to Tsunade after she had healed the spy, a report she was now reluctant to make. Sakura would need to reveal what he had told her, doing otherwise could be considered treason. And Sakura wasn't so sure her village was above accusing innocent people of treason if it served their interests enough.

No. What ridiculous thoughts. There were corrupt people in the world, Sakura wasn't naive enough to believe anything different. Tsunade-shishou wasn't one of them though. The leaders of Konoha had the villager's best interests at heart. If there was anyone she could trust, it was them.

The spy really had been trying to upset her, get under her skin, and make her doubt her own superiors, who had done nothing short of risk their lives to protect her. And Naruto. If he really had the demon in him, and Sakura could recall some unexplained events that suddenly made sense with that revelation, then surely he had been sent to train with Jiraiya to keep him safe. Naruto was no weapon, that's not why they sealed the demon in him. They weren't like some other leaders. Naruto was a hero, if anything. Not just a weapon. Certainly not a monster.

Sakura walked calmly up the tower stairs and knocked at the Hokage's door. A few seconds later, Shizune invited Sakura in. Tsunade had been reading, but looked up as Sakura approached to give her report.

"I already know what happened," the Hokage didn't even hesitate, cutting Sakura off before she could speak.

"Ibiki and his team were recording, remember? You did fine, mission complete. Dismissed."

Tsunade returned to her reading.

"Is it true?" Sakura looked at her feet, her fists clenched in anger. Why didn't she explain, if she had heard?

"Yes," Tsunade sighed heavily, "Naruto is a Jinchuuriki. It has been kept a secret for his own protection. I trust you understand that you too, must not reveal it to anyone. For his _and_ the village's safety."

That was all she needed to hear. Sakura nodded in relief, and turned to leave. Tsunade-shishou was looking out for him after all. Naruto wasn't a monster. The Akatsuki's spy _had_ just been trying to scare her.

* * *

It was about time Sakura had some time off. It was beautiful weather, a day just begging to be spent outside, but Sakura had a few indoor tasks that needed tending first. She could barely remember the last time she had a good night's sleep, or a shower, or even a change of clothes. She hurried home, thrilled to eat something home made and delicious before taking care of the other necessities. Mediocre tasks were just what she needed to take her mind off of the swirling emotions the day's events had stirred up. She would take the time to clean and organize the mess in her mind some other time. For now, she simply shoved the whole mess under the bed, out of sight and out of mind.

When Sakura walked through the front door of her home, her mother was waiting.

"Sakura-chan! Welcome home dear, finally! Here, come eat something, quickly," Sakura's mother grabbed her by the hand and led her into the kitchen. Sakura happily complied. Her mother busied herself with preparing food while Sakura sat at the small table in the kitchen, waiting patiently.

"Your grandparents are coming over soon," her mother sprung the unhappy news on Sakura as if discussing the latest volume of a popular novel. Sakura groaned, and her stomach echoed her distress. They certainly had perfect timing, didn't they?

"I just want you to know," her mother turned from the stove to face Sakura and her tone became more serious, "That I love you, and I support you. I know how unhappy it would make you to be forced into some loveless marriage, so I want you to know, that we'll be fine without them. They can't really hurt us, as long as we stick together."

Sakura was speechless. Her mother was willing to go broke, to scrape by on Sakura's meager Chuunin salary, all for the sake of Sakura's happiness. Their pompous irritating in-laws would never be able to break their spirit with something as trivial as finances. It wasn't about the money, it never was.

"Thank you," Sakura finally choked out, "Thanks, mom. I love you, so much!" She leapt out of her chair and hugged her mother gently. They remained embracing for several minutes, both choking back tears, until a firm rap at the door broke the serenity of the moment.

Without waiting for an invitation, Sakura's grandparents marched into the house and straight into the kitchen. Sakura and her mother turned and greeted them with huge but fake smiles.

"Sakura, you will be meeting with your husband tomorrow," her grandfather glared at her assertively, "and you will clean up before doing so."

Her grandmother guffawed at Sakura's mission worn appearance, but Sakura and her mother never stopped smiling.

"No," Sakura refused in her fake sweet voice. Her grandparents looked taken aback.

"If you refuse, you and your widow mother will be disowned!" he had raised his voice, no doubt in an attempt to make himself intimidating.

Sakura and her mother kept on smiling.

"Okay."

Her grandparents' eyes bulged. Her grandmother's out of shock, her grandfather's out of seething anger. He suddenly turned and began to march back towards the door.

Sakura's grandmother turned to follow, but not before shooting a glare at Sakura, "May you be cursed! Cursed with… eternal loneliness!"

"Wasn't planning on getting married anyway," Sakura shrugged, still smiling. Her grandmother huffed, and joined her husband. They stormed out together, slamming the door behind them. Sakura and her mother finally stopped smiling.

They let the silence hang over them, as the weight of the situation slowly sunk in. Sakura sighed in frustration. Her appetite had been chased off, again. She was feeling restless, and despite being exhausted, felt the sudden need to train, well, to punch something into oblivion anyway.

"I'm going to go clear my head, I'll eat when I get back," she waved at her mother, who nodded in understanding before returning to tend the stove again.

Sakura hurried into her room, and grabbed the scrolls off of her desk. She tucked them gently into her bag, and shoved a fistful of scrap paper in next to them in case any divine inspiration struck while she was punching shit.

On her way out, the smells wafting through the house from the kitchen made her stomach protest. Sakura relented a little, and grabbed the last banana out of the fruit bowl in the foyer before jogging through the streets towards her favorite training field.

* * *

It was the hottest part of the evening by the time Sakura had decided to train. Most of the training fields would be empty, since the busiest times of day were dusk and late evening, when the weather was cooler and more conducive to training. She didn't mind, since she had wanted to be alone and clear her mind with some good old fashioned violence in private. Avoiding most people was no problem. Unfortunately, Sakura ran into the person she was most hoping to avoid on her way to the training field.

"Sakura-chan!" Lee greeted with his usual enthusiasm as he tracked her down like a bee to a flower.

"Hey, Lee-kun!" Sakura faked a smile and greeted him back with a lie, "I was just looking for you!"

Sakura had said that she would let him know when her mission was over, but the situation that Ino and Tenten had made her aware of had persuaded her to change her mind. She still wasn't sure how she was going to handle him. Should she let him down gently? Or just cut to the chase and give him the ugly truth? Or maybe just string him along a little longer, just because Sakura had enough emotional turmoil on her mind? Yes, ignore it for now. So much easier. She really needed to punch something.

"I was just going to train some," Sakura began pointing in the direction of the training field as if it was rude to keep it waiting.

Lee jumped in before she could finish, "Excellent idea! I would love to train with you!"

When had she suggested training _together_? Whatever, she really just needed to punch something.

Sakura widened her fake smile and headed off again to the training field. Lee followed gleefully.

"Sakura-chan!" she didn't respond or slow down, so he just continued, "Did you get a chance to read the book I gave you?"

Sakura slowed down and turned to look back at him. Gods, she could be such a bitch sometimes. Even if it was only in her own head, she suddenly felt guilty for being anything other than grateful and friendly to the young man who had taken such a risk for her.

"No, the mission was too busy," she answered, genuinely disappointed that she hadn't, "Maybe you can show me the first steps today, and I'll read it on my own later?"

"Absolutely! For someone of your skill and intelligence, opening the first gate should be a snap!" he snapped his fingers to emphasize and grinned goofily at his own pun.

She laughed and rolled her eyes a little at his blatant flattery, but didn't complain.

Once they reached an area of the training field where they were sure they would be able to have a little privacy, Sakura set her bag down and pulled out the book Lee hand given her.

"Okay!" he began and gave Sakura a thumbs up, "I'll start by explaining the basics!"

Sakura nodded and opened the book to follow along with his notes. His hand writing was almost textbook neat, and Sakura felt a little reluctant to scribble her own sloppy notes along the margins, marring the beautiful handwriting. She sat in the shade of a tree while he stood nearby, one hand on a hip and the other pointing skywards, prepared for a lecture.

"The first gate is called the Gate of Opening, or Kaimon. All of the gates function basically the same, by releasing more chakra than your body could normally handle, but each gate has a unique attribute that it affects more heavily than others. Kaimon, most readily improves strength, while Kyuumon, the second gate, improves stamina. It is said that the chakra can be manipulated so it affects something other than those attributes, but it would require almost inhuman chakra control, so most people simply accept the attribute increase that comes naturally."

Sakura scribbled some hurried notes as Lee paused to take a breath. Inhuman chakra control, huh?

"Since this is new to you, we will stick to the first gate. It releases the lowest amount of chakra of the eight gates, and therefore causes the least amount of damage to the body. The eighth gate, Shimon, releases all of your chakra, which is where it gets its name, since that would kill you. When you open the gate, you need to focus a small amount of chakra at the point the gate represents, but it has to be done suddenly, or the chakra will just sit there. It sort of feels like getting flicked in the head with a rubber band when it works."

She recalled the sensation of his chakra changing the last time they had spared, and it had reminded her of a snapping rubber band as well.

"Why don't I open the first gate, then you try to replicate what it felt like yourself? Don't leave it open too long though, if that charka boost runs out you'll pass out. And if it starts to hurt, go ahead and stop, since we're just practicing, you don't need to damage yourself."

Sakura nodded, ignoring the fact that he implied that she wouldn't be able to handle a little pain. Though, the fact that he also implied that he was confident she would be able to open the first gate so easily served to smooth down her temper.

She walked over to him, and placed a hand on his shoulder, to make it easier to sense his chakra as it changed. As he focused his chakra, he began to grunt with effort.

"_Gods, are the noises really necessary?"_ Sakura took a step back, so he was more at arms length. She was quite sure the grunts and 'mphs' were just for show, and it made Sakura very glad that they were alone right now. He could be downright… peculiar, sometimes. Most of the time. Alright, all the time.

Suddenly, Sakura felt what seemed an unnecessarily large amount of chakra instantly concentrate from all areas of his body to the single chakra point in his head that represented the first chakra gate. As expected, she immediately felt the 'snapping rubber band' sensation, and his aura changed.

Sakura was quite certain she could replicate the feeling, and open the gate, and with less chakra than Lee had used. She was better than average at chakra control, after all.

Lee closed the gate, which Sakura likened to a stopper being suddenly set in a rushing vortex of draining water. He turned to her victoriously, but Sakura wasn't paying attention to his grin. She was busy assessing the damage to his body.

Chakra flows through the body in channels like water in a river. Opening the gates could then be likened to increasing the volume of water, to the point of a flood. Like the river water, the chakra overflows its banks, damaging the surrounding area and the chakra paths themselves.

Lee hadn't left the gate open long, and already the tissue immediately surrounding his chakra pathways was damaged and inflamed. It wasn't damage that could be seen from the surface, but it no doubt was painful, even if it would heal on its own eventually.

The damage done to his chakra pathways, however minute, would never quite heal. Every time he opened the gates, the damage accumulated, until one day he may not have chakra pathways left at all. Then, opening even the first gate would kill him.

Sakura probed with her chakra, and tested her ability to reverse the damage on a small area of chakra pathways near the skin. The tissue damage was easy to heal, but it took all of her concentration and a good deal of her low chakra reserves to heal even a tiny section of his chakra pathways. But it could be done. It was tedious and dangerous work, as one mistake could ruin the fragile vein-like structure permanently, but it was possible.

"Uh," Lee looked confused, and slightly flushed as he looked down at Sakura, who was staring at her grip on his shoulder intently, "What are you doing, Sakura-chan?"

"Oh!" she broke away, slightly embarrassed at her behavior. How long had she been standing there like that?

"I was just testing for damage," she explained, no longer flustered, "and healing you some."

"That's okay! I'm used to it! Like the deep burn after a good work out!" he jumped around energetically, as if to prove that he wasn't at all injured.

"Except," Sakura interrupted his posing, "It's not going to heal right, unless someone does it for you. I'm sure you already know, but don't over do it with the gates if you don't have to. They really are dangerous, I just didn't realize how much until I saw for myself what they do to your chakra pathways."

Lee looked disheartened, but eventually nodded.

"Doctor's orders!" he shouted happily, "Hey, are you going to try, or did you decide to not use them?"

Sakura decided that she needed to get rid of Lee. She had developed a new theory while listening to his lecture, and needed to test it. Alone.

"I think I'll stick to my medical jutsu for now," she lied, "I'm awfully tired, I think I'll rest here a bit and then head home. I need to recuperate after that mission."

"Would you like me to buy you dinner!?" he jumped forward bringing his face right in front of hers expectantly. Sakura wanted to groan but smiled instead.

"I already ate," another lie. Her stomach growled in protest at her refusal of free food.

"_Shuttup, you freaking black hole, I'll feed you later!" _

Lee looked confused, and a little hurt, but didn't press the issue.

"Okay, Sakura-chan, I'll see you tomorrow!" he waved and turned to leave.

"Sure!" Sakura replied, suddenly feeling a little guilty, again. He didn't realize that she was just trying to get rid of him, did he?

"_Of, course, now he chooses to not be dense as a brick when it's working against me,"_ she shook off the guilt and set to work scribbling down her revelation on her scrap paper.

* * *

It was nearing dusk by the time Sakura was satisfied with the development of her theory. The sun was nearly touching the horizon, bathing the area in burning red light. She gathered up her bag and tucked everything in the hollow of a tree in case something went wrong, she didn't want to damage the scrolls. With the experimental banana she had taken from the foyer in tow, she headed for the nearest clearing. It was a huge area on the outskirts of the village limits, not very wide, but easily more than a mile long. Perfect.

First, Sakura needed to open the first gate, not only to see if she could, but because her normal chakra reserves were nearly drained and most likely would not be enough to activate the jutsu.

She concentrated, and did just as Lee had told her, but with less chakra. To her surprise, her more efficient approach was just as effective, as the gate sprung open and her chakra changed.

It was a surreal sensation, and a little uncomfortable. It felt like Sakura's entire body was engulfed in flame that was washing over her like water. Sakura put the breaks on the chakra a little, trying to dull the pain without closing the gate. After a few seconds, Sakura had managed to reign in the excess chakra and mold it to her liking.

To counter the damaging effects of the chakra, Sakura began to heal the inflammation that was already starting around her chakra pathways. It didn't take much chakra to heal, since she had staved the chakra flood of her own accord, and now the chakra was no longer overflowing.

In less than a minute, Sakura had opened, and tamed the first chakra gate. She was now ready to use the chakra for any jutsu she wished.

Sakura snatched up the banana and hurriedly scribbled a focus symbol on it with the pen she had stashed in her side pouch. She focused her chakra, and gently tossed the banana in a high and wide arc down the length of the clearing.

"Ninpou, Fukappatsu na Jikoku no Jutsu."

Sakura poured a significant amount of her newly released chakra reserves into the jutsu, and stared at the banana with expectation. Considering how well everything else had gone so far, this should work perfectly. Right?

The banana continued unhurried on its expected trajectory. Wrong.

Sakura retrieved the banana and tried again. And again. And a fourth time. All with the same disheartening results.

By now, the activity that Sakura had hoped would distract her from her emotional turmoil was only making matters worse. Her face didn't reveal it, but her upwelling emotions exacerbated by her exhaustion, were threatening to break the surface in either violent or embarrassing ways. Or both. Weeping hysterically while reducing the largest tree in the training area to sawdust sounded like a great idea at the moment.

Sakura sat exhausted at one end of the clearing. She had since closed the first gate, because there was no need to waste the chakra needed to keep it open and keep her healthy. The jutsu, by all accounts, should have worked. It just needed a large enough volume of chakra released at one time to activate. With the right concentration, the amount Sakura had been experimenting with should have been more than enough, according to her calculations. Maybe she needed to recalculate. Maybe she needed to stop wasting her time on jutsu that may never work.

With a frustrated yell, Sakura grabbed the banana none too gently and jumped angrily to her feet. If the damn thing wouldn't teleport like she wanted, then she'd just break the sound barrier with it instead. That could be a _little_ entertaining.

Sakura reared back, and out of anger, reopened the gate for a chakra boost that could send the damn thing flying half way across the country. As she focused to open the gate, she screamed at the banana.

"Ninpou, Fukappatsu na Jikoku no Jutsu!"

She said the jutsu like she was cussing, and for all intents and purposes, she was. The chakra gate snapped open, and Sakura noticed something was a little different with her chakra, but was too pissed to care. The banana left Sakura's fingers with blinding speed. The next instant, Sakura felt more strongly the odd anomaly in her chakra. It felt like some external force was sucking the chakra out of her in a slow steady stream. In her alarm, she immediately staved the flow, and closed the gate. The sensation stopped.

Sakura turned her attention skyward, to the unfortunate banana, which should have been sailing somewhere half way down the open field by now. But it was nowhere to be seen. She should have been able to spot it, even in the dimming light of the sunset. But she couldn't find it.

Dismayed, Sakura strolled down the field, scanning the ground. Finally, at the far end of the field, right along the edge in a small thicket, she found the experimental banana. If it had gone that far, Sakura should have been able to see it in the air. But she didn't. It was as if it had… teleported.

Sakura whooped and jumped around in joy. She looked like a raving maniac, but she didn't care. The jutsu had worked!

What had she done differently? She performed the jutsu the same instant she opened the gate. Of course! How foolish of her to not realize it sooner. Like opening the gate, it didn't matter really how much chakra, but how _instantly_. The sudden rush of chakra that happened when the gate was opened was what triggered the jutsu, and the draining flow afterwards was maintaining the jutsu. It didn't take much chakra either, she just had to be incredibly precise when she did it.

Sakura grabbed the banana out of the bush, and examined it. It looked unharmed, though slightly bruised for its earlier rougher landings. She peeled back the skin and examined the fruit. It looked normal too. Sakura hungrily took a bite. It tasted like a banana!

It wasn't liquefied, heated up, cooled down, or chemically altered in any way. Sakura ate and laughed, a little crazily, amazed that she had at last cracked the first of her scrolls.

Sakura's celebration was cut short when two ANBU appeared nearby and approached her. What an embarrassing state to be caught in. Giggling hysterically with a mouthful of banana. She blushed a little as she swallowed the last bite.

"Come with us," one ANBU stated dryly.

"Sure, just let me-"

"Now."

Odd. It must have been an emergency, but why didn't he just say so? Sakura had wanted to get her bag with her scrolls in it, but she figured they could wait. They would be safe until after her meeting, since few people used the training field at night. Sakura followed the ANBU back towards town, one in front, the other behind her. Didn't they usually just lead the way?

At first, Sakura assumed they were heading towards the Hokage's tower, but she soon realized that they were heading for the jail. The same place she had healed the Akatsuki spy in the interrogation room. Did they need her to heal him again after all? Did they get enough information this time to make another attempt worth it? She secretly hoped not, since she couldn't help but feel a little sorry for the man, even if he was the enemy.

When they approached the front entrance, there was a small group of ANBU waiting. Sakura didn't recognize any of them. The two escorting her, delivered her directly to the ANBU captain waiting at the head of the group.

"Haruno Sakura?" he inquired, very professionally. It was a little intimidating.

"_Not Haruno for long, once by grandparents finish disowning me,"_ Sakura thought dryly, but answered instead.

"Yes?"

"You are under arrest-"

"WHAT!?"

"- for creation of and experimentation with strictly forbidden jutsu."

* * *

A/N: Here we go! PLOT NO JUTSU! Not much action, but important stuff about Sakura's new jutsu, her grandparents being a-holes, her mommy being kinda awesome. The information about the chakra gates was mostly taken from canon, but I added a little of my own take on it, to fill in holes and make it work with Sakura's abilities. Yay, the banana teleported! It was a nice day, until that whole getting arrested thing. That sucks. Thanks for the reviews and watches and faves and stuff! It makes me warm and fuzzy.

Shameless self promotion: I'm brainstorming another story, Sakura-centric as well. Info is on my profile, so check it out and let me know if it's something that interests you. Thanks!


	9. It's a Shitty Day

**Shinri "Truth"**

* * *

**Chapter Nine – It's a Shitty Day**

**Truth - the true or actual state of a matter.**

* * *

Sakura couldn't sleep. The holding cell was devastatingly dark. Even with the presence of a small window, no light reached Sakura's eyes. When had the clouds settled in? Hadn't it been a clear day earlier? Where was the moon? Where were the stars?

When Sakura had realized the real reason she had been summoned, she decided quickly that cooperation would be the quicker path to freedom. She had followed the ANBU without complaint, and had entered the holding cell without struggle. If she did as she was told, and explained herself calmly, then they'd realize their mistake and she would be sent home with an apology soon. Right?

But they hadn't made a mistake. She _was_ experimenting with kinjutsu, she just didn't mean any harm by it. How did they find out? Did they see her teleport the banana? Did they find the scrolls? Why hadn't anyone told her yet exactly why she was here?

"_Because,"_ Sakura realized, _"The less I know, the more they'll be able to find out."_

If she was panicked or confused, the interrogation would be easier for them. If they interrogated her at all. Maybe Sakura should beat them to it and spill the beans all over them, so there was nothing left for them to punish her for. Then Tsunade would protect her, convince everyone that Sakura was well intentioned, because, 'See? She told us everything!'

How miserable. Sitting helplessly in the dark, waiting for someone to come to the rescue. Desperate for salvation, instead of relying on her own abilities. Sakura was disgusted with herself, but saw no other option. She couldn't see anything in the dark.

What would everyone think, if they found out she had been arrested? Would Kakashi-sensei be disappointed in her? Would Ino no longer want to be her friend? Would Lee find someone else to crush over? Would her mother loose confidence in her? What would happen to Naruto when he came home to find that not only Sasuke, but she too had become a criminal?

Sakura didn't want to believe that the bonds she shared with her friends and family were really that weak, but in the desperation and fear of the moment, she wasn't so sure.

"_Life's funny sometimes, ne?"_ _ Ino looked introspective, "Things never seem to turn out the way you plan."_

"_Yeah." _

"_But you know what?" her blue eye winked, "It's not always a bad thing."_

"Like hell it isn't," Sakura angrily murmured at the ground.

She closed her eyes, but didn't bother trying to sleep. Her arms wrapped tighter around her legs, and she shivered. She felt cold, though the summer night was warm. Sakura thought she felt a flicker of nearby chakra, but it vanished as quickly as it had appeared.

She opened her eyes out of habit, and scanned the room. Wait. She could see. Ever so slightly, a glowing orange light began to fill the outside hall, streaming in through the cell bars in chopped shafts of light.

Footsteps approached, and Sakura nearly jumped for joy when she saw the familiar busty silhouette appear around the corner.

"Tsunade-shishou!" Sakura whisper yelled happily.

Tsunade hushed her with a waving hand, but smiled gently, "I just came to reassure you."

Sakura scooted over to the bars nearer the Hokage and listened intently.

"I snuck in here," Tsunade admitted, "Just to see you."

"What's going on, Shishou? I'm no criminal!" Sakura whispered her fears through the bars. Tsunade nodded in agreement.

"I know, but earlier this evening, I sent an ANBU to find you for a mission. I sent Shizune on the mission instead, since instead of finding _you_ in your mother's home, they found your scribbled drabbles instead."

"Eh!?" Sakura was a confused mix of shocked and relieved.

"The council confiscated the notes, and upon examining them, decided that they could be dangerous. They don't know you like I do though. I know you're just too bright for your own good. I'm going to do my best to assure them that no action need be taken, all you have to do is cooperate and be truthful when they interview you tomorrow morning."

Sakura nodded with elation. Everything was going to be okay after all.

"I have to go, since I'm not technically supposed to be here. Get some sleep, if you can."

Tsunade stood and left in a flash, still concealing her chakra. Sakura was less stressed, but still not very sleepy.

They hadn't found the scrolls. They hadn't seen her perform the jutsu. All they had were messy notes. All they knew was what little she had written down that first night she had discovered the scrolls. It wasn't much. They didn't really _have_ anything.

Should Sakura give them the scrolls? Should she have done that in the first place?

"_I can only hope and pray that by leaving them sealed and hidden in the house of my family that only people I can trust will be able to find them… Keep my sacrifice from being in vain. Sincerely, Mi-chan."_

Would she be doing a disservice to her ancestor's memory by handing the scrolls over to people she didn't even know personally?

_His voice was rougher and raspy from his fit of coughing, "I don't work for monsters any more than you do."_

Were the council members someone she could trust? She had her doubts lately, she hated to admit it.

"_Sakura-chan!" Lee, ugh, "Did you get a chance to read the book I gave you?"_

Her scrolls were in the hollow of a tree, in her bag, with _his_ book. The book filled with a kinjutsu that his _Sensei _had to fight for the right to use. The book Lee had written a cheesy note in the back of, and signed.

If she told them where the scrolls were, Lee would be in just as much trouble as her. If not more. They couldn't find that book! Why hadn't she been more careful with it!?

Revealing the existence, let alone the location, of the scrolls was now officially out of the question. In her negligence, she had put not only herself, but someone who cared for her, in a dangerous position. Now she was stuck. Well and truly stuck. For Lee's sake, she would have to try to lie by omission to the council, who no doubt would have Ibiki or one of his colleagues on their side. Was her emotional mask convincing enough to prevent arousing suspicions? Did she have the skill to deceive such a man?

"_Good work," Ibiki commented dryly. It was by far the most positive reinforcement Sakura had ever heard out of the man's mouth. Ever._

_Kakashi walked over and placed a hand on her head, "That's my student."_

"_You have some mighty will power, Sakura. I'm proud of you."_

Maybe, just maybe, she did.

* * *

Sakura awoke to the sound of her cell door opening. When had she fallen asleep? She supposed she was better off, since she needed the energy and she hadn't eaten anything but the experimental banana since leaving for her last mission. Popping soldier pills while sprinting through the woods was hardly proper nourishment in her opinion.

The ANBU leaned forward and offered her hand to help Sakura to her feet. Sakura realized that the ANBU was the young woman she had been interacting with a great deal lately. At least she was someone sympathetic, and familiar enough with Sakura to know that she was no villain.

Sakura accepted the help, and stood up easily. Silently, the ANBU put chakra suppressing hand cuffs on Sakura.

"_I suppose it's just standard procedure,"_ Sakura reassured herself as the cold metal pressed against her wrists.

"I'm taking you to the council hearing," the young woman spoke gently to Sakura, "They probably won't make a decision right away. Tsunade-sama asked me to remind you to stay calm and be truthful."

"Thanks," Sakura responded, and smiled weakly, "I will."

The ANBU gestured for Sakura to leave the cell first, and the two walked silently down the corridors. Sakura wished she had taken an opportunity to shower and change after her last mission. Her clothes were dirty, her hair was dirty, and she was starting to smell enough to offend herself. Now she was supposed to make a good impression on the council? She didn't even have her hitai-ate. She didn't even have the scrap of fabric Ino had given her to tie her hair back when they were little. She was exhausted. She was starving. She was a right mess.

After a few minutes, Sakura realized where she was being led. She had hoped the hearing would be held in the Hokage's Tower, but the foreboding halls marked the route to a different familiar place. The interrogation room.

The doors slid open with a groan as the two approached. Sakura smiled at Ibiki's familiar but daunting face as he stood aside for the two women to enter, then shoved the door back in its place. The crash echoed through the room, though it wasn't empty. At the edges of the room, shrouded in darkness, six people were seated. In the middle of the room, illuminated by the single dim orange-red light, stood the chair. The same chair the Akatsuki spy had been tied to, only the blood had since been washed off.

Sakura was physically directed to the chair by her ANBU escort. She sat willingly, and sat back with her legs crossed and her cuffed hands on her knees. It would help communicate that she was calm and relaxed. Though, in reality, she wasn't.

"_Smile, be polite, be relaxed, you have nothing to fear, tell them the truth, tell them everything, just like you practiced,"_ Sakura smiled gently, sweetly, though the light directly above her head was a little blinding.

Sakura had practiced, memorized, and repeated to herself the scenario that she was going to paint for the council today. It included everything, in detail, except for the scrolls. Everything was explained, Sakura was innocent. Everything would be fine.

She had repeated the lie so much to herself during the night and on the way to the interrogation room that she was convinced herself that it was the truth. It was the only thing that was going to fool someone like Ibiki. If it did at all.

"Haruno Sakura," Sakura tilted her head in the direction of the voice. It sounded like an old woman, probably the one on the head of the council, though Sakura couldn't be sure.

"Do you know why you are here today?" the disembodied voice of the old woman echoed eerily through the room.

"…not …exactly…" Sakura's own voice sounded dull, and it hung in her ears like she was trying to speak through cotton.

"_No, I don't know anything, since I __**didn't**__ see Shishou last night,"_ she reminded herself of the lie.

"Your notes are very… interesting. Life jutsu. _Immortality_ jutsu. Where are the rest of the notes?"

Sakura immediately recognized the baited question. 'I don't know' would imply that there _were_ more notes.

"Everything I have about those things would be…" Sakura paused as if she was trying to remember where she had left something important, "on my desk, in my room at home."

"So these _are_ your notes."

Sakura nodded, "Why?"

"You do realize, Haruno-san, that these jutsu are strictly forbidden?"

"I don't _have _those _jutsu_. I just wrote down some brainstorming ideas about jutsu and chakra in general that could be applied to lots of other jutsu."

"How long have you been experimenting with these _ideas_, then?"

Another baited question.

"I haven't experimented with _anything_, I just get bored and free write. Sometimes Shinobi related stuff comes out."

"What were you doing in the training field last night when the ANBU detained you?"

"_What the hell else do you do in a __**training**__ field?"_

"Training."

"The report says something different. Described your behavior as… peculiar."

"_Ugh, Gods, I __**have**__ been hanging out with Lee too much."_

Sakura coughed in embarrassment.

"I, uh. I was eating a banana… happily."

There was a deafening period of silence.

"Please, continue."

"_Bitch."_

"I told myself," Sakura resigned herself to being humiliated, "That if I did 100 chakra-free laps around the training field, I would get to… eat the banana."

"There was a focus symbol painted on the skin."

"It was so I'd focus on the banana… to make myself hungry… so I wouldn't fail at my training."

"_I even __**sound**__ like Lee."_

"Alright, Haruno-san. That will be all."

"_Wait, what?"_ Sakura kept her confusion from showing on her face. She feigned satisfaction.

"_That couldn't be it? Was it really that easy? Maybe they're convinced I'm too goofy to be hostile…"_

"Take her back to her holding cell."

"_Back to the cell? Well, I __**was**__ warned that they wouldn't make a decision right away. I guess I'll just be sent home from there once the paperwork is done."_

The familiar ANBU approached Sakura, and gently helped her up from the chair. She led Sakura out of the room and back down the halls. Sakura complied, glad to have the 'interrogation' behind her.

* * *

Sakura was losing track of time. How long had it been since she had been brought back to the cell? It had to be approaching noon. If they were going to keep her much longer, shouldn't they at least feed her?

"_With all of the chakra I drained last night, I really need to eat, more so than usual."_

Her stomach growled angrily in concurrence.

"You're telling me," she responded aloud. Sakura occupied herself by picking at the dust that accumulated in the corner she was slouched against.

"_If dust is made predominantly of shed human skin cells,"_ Sakura pinched a bit of the grey dust between her fingers, _"then why is there so much of it here? What is this stuff made of?"_

She blew on the dust, sending it spiraling through the meager sunlight where it twinkled a little like snow flakes, "_There don't seem to be enough humans here to account for the dust. Or maybe they just never, __**ever**__ clean the place. Eww."_

Sakura was distracted from her distraction by an approaching chakra.

"_Finally! Food!"_ she leapt up to greet the person, but soon realized that it wasn't food.

The familiar chakra belonged to Tsunade, and when she came into view, Sakura was disappointed to realize that she wasn't carrying anything edible. She was still happy to see her Shishou though, hopeful that she would be bringing word that Sakura could go home, and eat.

"Sakura-chan," Tsunade greeted her, but she sounded uneasy.

"How much longer?" Sakura stood and leaned against the bars towards Tsunade, "Until I get to go home?"

"I don't know, exactly, Sakura," Tsunade looked drained, and her voice sounded a little scratchy, like she had been yelling, a lot.

"Everything's okay, though, right?" Sakura wasn't blind to her Shishou's mood, and doubt filled her words.

"One of the people at the hearing was the Daimyo," Tsunade made eye contact with Sakura, her expression was dark, "In town on other business, stayed when he heard about you. Someone, I don't know who, made an offhand comment, comparing your notes to experiments that Orochimaru had done."

"What!? But! Tsunade-shishou, I'm not at all like _him_! You know I'm not some _evil monster_!" Sakura immediately regretted her outburst when Tsunade's expression became offended. Before she could apologize, Tsunade had wiped the feelings away.

She calmly continued, "I _know_, Sakura. I'm doing everything I can, but once that fool gets an idea in his head… the council isn't trying to soothe him…he has the final say."

Sakura was becoming increasingly anxious.

"He and the council have the village's best interests in mind, they really do, but…" Tsunade broke eye contact and stared at her feet, "they don't know you like I do. They… why?"

"What?" Sakura wasn't sure what the question was directed at, "Why…what?"

"Why were you writing down notes about those kinds of jutsu? You know what they would be used for. Bringing back the dead to steal their power, making evil people immortal, why would you research such a thing?" Tsunade was trying to disguise the anger in her voice.

"Shishou," Sakura was near tears. Didn't Tsunade trust her?

"You know I would never…" Sakura took a shaky breath and told the truth, "I didn't think I'll ever be able to get them to work, not really. But I thought, if I did, somehow, I could use them to protect the village, to protect, Naruto-kun, Kakashi-sensei, Ino-chan…you. Everyone."

Tsunade sighed heavily, "I know, I'm sorry. I know you aren't so selfish. But the Daimyo doesn't know that. He has you painted as the next Orochimaru, and he…he just wants to prevent what has happened to the village before from happening again."

"What's he going to do?" Sakura was glad Tsunade didn't doubt her, but she was still near tears with worry.

"Nothing," Tsunade set her jaw firmly, "He isn't going to do anything to you if I can help it. I'll stop by again this evening, to let you know. Hopefully, by then, you'll be going home like you have planned."

Tsunade tried to bolster Sakura's confidence with a smile, and Sakura smiled meekly back. Tsunade turned to leave, so she didn't see the meager smile fall crashing to the ground. When Sakura was sure she was alone, she let herself cry. She slumped down against the bars of the cell, clinging to them like a life raft. Sakura's life was a mess.

* * *

"_Thank you."_

_Then darkness. And nightmares. His retreating back, his voice at her ear. Her unspoken fears, tempered by sheer lonely terror. Voices. _

"… _you'll catch a cold…"_

_Unyielding stone pressed against her side and head. It was the cold that woke her first._

* * *

Sakura woke with a start. She lay sprawled pathetically on the cold stone floor against the bars of her cell, still clinging to them for dear life. Why was she having that dream again? She pried herself painfully from the bars and slouched against the adjacent wall instead.

"_At least I'm getting damn good at crying myself to sleep," _she thought bitterly.

She looked out at the sky through the tiny window and figured that she hadn't been asleep long. It was an overcast day, so it was hard to judge the time, but it wasn't quite evening, and Sakura had some time to kill before Tsunade would come back with the news.

Sakura didn't have a guard, and she couldn't sense anyone nearby, though she figured it was because escape from the place was nearly impossible. If the chakra barriers on all of the doors and windows didn't stop you, the patrolling ANBU certainly would.

She was completely alone, and found the notion oddly comforting. Maybe she should take the opportunity for some training, though nothing too strenuous, since she still hadn't been fed.

The final step in mastering the time jutsu was upon her. Now that she had performed it on the banana, she needed to try it on a human. Herself, naturally. She stayed slouched instead of sitting at attention, just in case anyone _was_ watching, and began to focus her chakra.

She picked up a pinch of dust from the corner and blew it into the air. She watched the dust swirl in the light and fall back towards earth.

Concealing her chakra, opening the gate, automatically healing herself, and casting the time jutsu all at the same exact instant was going to take all of her concentration. She closed her eyes.

"_Ninpou, Fukappatsu na Jikoku no Jutsu."_

Sakura opened her eyes, and watched the dust fall, slowly. She allowed more chakra to be sucked out of her body by the jutsu, and the swirling dust slowed until it simply hung immobile in mid air.

Sakura released the jutsu, and closed the gate. She sighed in relief. That was easier than she thought it would be. The focus it required, and the successful first attempt had calmed her nerves as well. She may have been having a shitty day, but she was still pretty awesome.

Sakura was going to try a second attempt, and maybe try moving while the jutsu was active, but decided against it when she felt Tsunade's chakra approaching.

"_Finally!"_ Sakura jumped up excitedly.

When Tsunade came into view, Sakura's heart sank. The Hokage looked like she had been crying, and was now forcing back her emotions.

"Shi…shou…?"

Tsunade took a shaky breath.

"I…tried. He's so _fucking _stubborn sometimes. Stupid ass, ignorant-" Tsunade continued cussing, but Sakura wasn't listening anymore. It was like her ears had decided for her that she didn't want to hear what her Shishou was about to say.

"I can't do _anything_ anymore, damn it!" Tsunade was yelling now, her fists clenched like she was ready to send an unfortunate piece of furniture through three solid brick walls, "The senile old bastards on the council support his…his…_decision_." She said the last word like it had hurt to even think it.

"What? Shishou," Sakura was surprised that her voice even worked anymore, "what decision?"

Tsunade looked up at Sakura slowly, and the tears began to fall again against the Hokage's will.

"Execution."

* * *

A/N: I sure am getting good at evil cliffhangers, ne? Don't worry, I'll keep that crap to a minimum from now on, or at least update soon enough that you don't have nightmares. I'm also quite the writing machine, mostly because of all of the positive feedback I've been getting. My muse monkey eats reviews. So, more love for all of my reviewers and watchers. You guys are so awesome, that I've decided to give you a special treat! It's a contest! If you win, you get a one-shot of your choice! Details are in my profile!


	10. Lessons in Strength and Love

**Shinri "Truth"**

* * *

**Chapter Ten - Lessons in Strength and Love**

**Truth - the state or character of being true.**

* * *

Sakura was falling. Or maybe she wasn't. She felt far away, but she remained exactly where she stood. Standing came as a surprise to her. How was she even able to stand anymore? Were her legs acting of their own accord, or was it her white knuckle grip on the bars that was keeping her upright? Or maybe it was the sheer and utter shock that had shattered the connection between her mind and body, leaving her rooted, frozen, to the spot.

Desperately, Sakura searched for an answer, or just a question, anything to solidify into a coherent thought. But her mind was such a swirling turmoil that stringing together anything of sense and forcing it past her dry lips was impossible. She just stared, hollow eyed, at Tsunade.

The Hokage had been focusing her attention on recollecting herself, and having finally chocked the tears back far enough, continued to explain the gravity of the situation to Sakura.

"The Daimyo doesn't have anything against you personally, I promise you. This isn't about _you_ anymore Sakura. It's just the jutsu, and the fears of what they can do."

Sakura still couldn't speak. She only stared.

"Konoha has suffered great loss over such things, like the death of the Sandaime Hokage at Orochimaru's hands. And with all of the enumerated threats outside of the village, the Daimyo and the council are just doing what they think will prevent another threat from arising _within_ the village. I know they're wrong, but they think they are saving the village. I'm sorry."

Sakura sunk to her knees, her legs finally giving out as her body turned to the same mush as her mind. Tsunade stood by silently, giving Sakura the space and time to gather herself, if she was able to at all.

Sakura's mind finally strung a thought together.

"_Doing what's best for the village. Saving the village from…me? Hah!"_

Sakura only realized that her incredulous huff had been aloud when Tsunade looked down at her expectantly.

"_It is out of my heart, out of the love and compassion I feel for the people of my family and my village that I will stand before them and be judged as a criminal. I meddled in affairs forbidden to women. I discovered powers forbidden to all."_

Sakura's life was beginning to resemble her ancestor's. Maybe the scrolls were cursed.

"_It's a sacrifice I'm willing to make."_

Was Sakura prepared to die at the hands of her loved ones, just as Miharu had? It didn't seem she had much choice in the matter. She was going to be killed, whether she was prepared or not. The least she could do, was go to her death with dignity, just as her Great, Great Grandmother had.

Before Sakura could reassure her Shishou that she was going to be fine, someone approached from the hall. Sakura recognized the chakra as the woman who had interrogated her, and then recognized the face of Utatane Koharu, the council member, as she rounded the corner.

"Haruno Sakura," the old woman addressed Sakura formally, "I see Tsunade-hime has already given you news of the Daimyo's decision. As you can see, we do not take matters of village security lightly. I apologize for the harshness of the decision. I have come to hear you final request, if you have one, before the private execution tomorrow morning."

"_Private? So they are keeping it under wraps? Does that mean that the rest of the village is unaware that I have even been arrested?"_ Sakura decided that it was most likely a good thing.

She mused silently over her final request. She eventually decided that if she was going to go to her death with dignity, it would help to not be starving. She cleared her throat and tried to lick her lips, but her mouth was still dry and uncooperative.

Eventually, Sakura choked out, "Just a decent meal, thank you."

The council woman nodded curtly, and left to make the request. Tsunade crouched down on the floor next to Sakura, but remained silent, still respectfully waiting for her student to clear her thoughts.

"I never thought…" Sakura's voice was still a weak whisper, "it would…_end_. Like _this_."

A crushing silence filled the room again as Sakura struggled to continue speaking.

"I…never amounted to…_anything_."

"Don't say that," Tsunade interrupted Sakura's self destructive thoughts.

"It's true," Sakura's voice had found some strength in anger. Anger at herself for her perpetual weakness.

"I'm still so helpless! I've always been the weakest one on the team!" Sakura clenched her fists in frustration, "I'm still just some weak little girl! I'm no Shinobi." The last sentence came with a tone of defeat.

It was Tsunade's turn to be angry, "Weak!? Compared to what!?"

"Eh?" Sakura was a little taken aback by her Shishou's outburst. She tilted her chin up so she could study Tsunade's enraged face as she continued her tirade.

"You can't compare yourself to that traitorous prick with his kekkei genkai!" Sakura presumed she meant Sasuke, "Or that loud mouthed idiot with his demon chakra!" and that must be Naruto, "You aren't giving yourself enough credit!"

Tsunade threw her arms in the air in annoyance, "Hell! Compared to them even _I_ come up short in some arenas, and I'm the _fucking_ Hokage!"

She stood with her hands on her hips, and towered over Sakura who sat mesmerized on the opposite side of the bars, "_I_ trained you to be the best medic-nin we have! _ I_ trained you to be one of the best Shinobi that we have. I _trained_ you! And if you _ever_ belittle yourself like that again, I will take it as a personal insult!"

Sakura was flabbergasted. She would have been flattered, and beaming, if not for the impending doom that hung over her like a thick fog. Tsunade sighed, finally calmer, and nodded curtly at her stunned student before leaving.

"I'll bring you your food this evening, just try to rest until then."

"Sure," Sakura answered blandly, finding irony in the advice to rest up for her execution.

Tsunade turned to add a final thought before disappearing down the hall, "You're going to need it."

"_What?"_ Sakura was thoroughly confused by the Hokage's last cryptic statement. Going to need what? Rest?

* * *

As Sakura's luck would have it, she most likely _did_ need rest for some unforeseen reason, since no matter how hard she tried, rest eluded her. Her mind kept trying to wander, but Sakura shut it up. What mattered anymore? She would be dead soon. Nothing mattered.

Her attention turned to the mess in her mind. Her once meticulously organized thoughts and memories lay scattered across her mind's floor, or carelessly smooshed up in one corner. What did it matter, if she organized her thoughts now? Nothing mattered.

But out of boredom, and restlessness, Sakura found herself finally pondering issues that had been troubling her for the past few days.

"_I'm going to get stronger! I'm going to bring that bastard back! You'll see! Just you wait Sakura-chan! Just you wait!" _

Naruto. When she had found out he was leaving, she had been angry. More angry than was logical. Maybe, even then, she had a premonition that it was going to be the last time she would ever see him. What would it do to him, when he found out she was dead? Would he be able to keep on fighting, knowing that he had failed to save both of his most precious people?

"_I could get in trouble," he nodded his head in emphasis as he spoke, "but I'll do it for you… Sakura-chan."_

Lee. Stubborn, determined Lee. Peculiar. Downright…weird. But Sakura realized that for all of his shortcomings, he was someone who deserved her respect. Maybe even her love. Why did it have to take her impending death to make her see that maybe, just maybe, she could have loved him back? Maybe she really should have just given him the chance. What would he do without her now? Would he mourn, or would he just find someone else to harass. No, he would miss her. Lee was someone who really and truly cared. One of her precious people.

"_It's OK, forehead," Ino chided, "We just started without you." _

"_What's new on the grapevine today, oh great gossip pig?"_

Ino. They were best friends once. Then worst enemies, it seemed. But they had never really grown apart, and soon realized that they had never stopped loving each other, even as they fought over boys. Who would Ino bicker with now? There would be no more lunch time gossip. No more tea with Hinata and Tenten. What would they talk about after she died? Would they keep holding their meetings without her? Would they move on and try to forget, or would they continue on in her memory?

"_I just want you to know," Sakura looked up as her mother spoke, "That I love you, and I support you."_

Mother. She had sacrificed so much, and it would come to nothing. Her mother had put up with so much harassment from her husband's family, and had stood up to them, consequences be damned, all for Sakura's sake. What would her mother do now? How would she feel when she finally realized that she was completely and utterly alone?

_Her grandmother shot a glare at Sakura, "May you be cursed! Cursed with… eternal loneliness!"_

Maybe the curse hadn't been meant for Sakura after all.

"_Uh…yeah…. Love you too," he gently patted her shoulder._

Kakashi-sensei. He hadn't thought much of her at first. She hadn't thought much of him either, for that matter. Who would have thought that she would grow to love the tardy perverted ninja? Who would have thought she would have grown to earn his respect? But now, she didn't feel like he would be proud of her anymore. What would he think of her when he found out why she had been executed? Would he react the same way the Daimyo and the Council had, and assume it was for the good of the village? Would he miss her at all after that? Did he really love her back?

"_Thank you."_

Sasuke. Prick. Sakura had inwardly laughed a little when Tsunade had called him that. But his behavior towards his teammates made sense in light of what Sakura had discovered. It wasn't some nameless man or rogue ninja that had wiped out Sasuke's clan. It wasn't some complete stranger that Sasuke sought for revenge. It was his own brother.

Had they been close? It seemed they may have been. Sasuke probably loved him, and looked up to his older brother. If so, then Sasuke wasn't cold to his teammates because he didn't care. It was just because he had cared for his brother more. And that love and trust had been completely and utterly betrayed in the most awful of fashions. What things had Sasuke witnessed that night? How terrible must it have been for someone so young to be left so completely alone?

"_Thank you," his voice at her ear._

"_Thank you for what, Sasuke?"_

Sakura wasn't sure she'd ever know. But maybe, he was thanking not just her, but Naruto too, for trying to let him know that he wasn't alone anymore.

But now he would be. Would he even care, if he ever found out that she had died? Was he even the Sasuke she remembered anymore?

Was she even the Sakura he remembered anymore?

No, she wasn't. She had made a point not to be, to make herself better. Tsunade had said that she was one of the best Shinobi in the village. But now, she was right back where she stared, worse off even, rotting in a little prison cell, waiting helplessly for her fate to come crashing down on her.

"_These scrolls contain jutsu I developed to help me protect the people I love. If you use them, then only use them as I had intended. Keep my sacrifice from being in vain. Sincerely, Mi-chan."_

What could she do? She was helpless. If she tried to escape they could kill her.

"_Keep my sacrifice from being in vain."_

If she didn't escape, they surely _would_ kill her.

"_Why the hell not!?"_ Sakura demanded of herself when she hesitated at the decision that was laid at her feet.

"_Escape? Escape and do __**what**__, exactly?"_

She had no where to run to. She had no where to go. There would be no one on the outside waiting for her, giving her shelter, protecting her.

"_Keep my sacrifice from being in vain."_

Should she continue to learn the jutsu? Use them, to protect her precious people? Sakura wasn't sure she liked where her thoughts were carrying her.

If she did escape, and got away, it wouldn't be for long. They would hunt her down, and someday, they would kill her. The life of a missing-nin was hard, violent, and usually came to an abrupt end. And for what?

"_Not __**what**__,"_ Sakura answered herself, _"__**Who**__."_

_They_ were worth it. Her precious people. If there was any chance, any chance at all, that she would be able to do something, _anything_, to keep everyone, all of Konoha, safe, then what kind of Shinobi would she be if she didn't take it? She was slated to die tomorrow morning anyway, she had nothing to loose, and everyone else potentially, had so much to gain.

It was a risk she was willing to take. It was a sacrifice she was willing to make.

Sakura would make the opportunity for escape later that night, after she had a chance to eat and replenish her chakra levels a little. With her mind in better order, and her goal in place, Sakura found that rest was no longer so elusive and she slowly drifted off to sleep on the cold stone ground.

* * *

"Sakura-chan."

The voice was familiar. Sakura felt stiff and heavy, like her limbs had been nailed to the ground. She forced her eyes open.

"Sakura-chan," Tsunade looked down at her gently, with a tray of food in her hands, "I have your dinner."

Sakura bolted upright, suddenly completely awake at the mention of food. She scooted over to the slot in the bars where Tsunade was sliding the tray under for her.

"I gave you an extra napkin, since I know how tidy you are," Tsunade winked suspiciously, and Sakura cocked her head in wonder.

"_If I'm tidy, I don't need another napkin,"_ Sakura thought curiously as she studied the retreating back of her mentor for what Sakura feared would be the last time.

"Thank you, Shishou!" Sakura exclaimed happily and she began to examine the contents of the tray.

Sakura had asked for a _decent_ meal, and she wondered who's idea of decent the meal represented. There was hot tea, for which Sakura was grateful. A small lump of cold white rice sat adjacent to the mug of tea, which in turn sat next to a greasy looking pile of fried tofu wrapped in nori. The vegetable at the bottom of the tray, upon suspicious inspection, Sakura decided used to be green peas, until someone carelessly cooked them into oblivion. The extra napkin Tsunade had given her sat underneath the one the cooking staff had provided.

Wasting no time, Sakura devoured the rice. She washed that down with some of the tea, pausing a little to appreciate how the hot liquid soothed her throat which was raw from crying. She tested the tofu, and decided that despite appearances, it was actually quite edible, and downed it as quickly as the rice.

She poked at the peas, and some liquefied under the gentle prodding. Eww. Sakura resigned herself to her tea, it would do for now. She wiped her mouth with the top napkin.

Tsunade's odd behavior and cryptic words had made Sakura curious. She picked up the extra napkin to examine it. As she lifted the folded fabric, a heavy metal key came sliding out and crashed loudly against the food tray.

Sakura scurried to snatch the key up and tuck it into her shirt, praying that there was no surveillance that she was unaware of. The napkin itself, began to emit a tiny chakra signature as it absorbed and reacted to the chakra in Sakura's hand.

"Eh!?" Sakura was taken aback. Tsunade _had _been up to something.

She unfolded the napkin, which revealed Tsunade's handwriting hidden inside. The characters appeared slowly, reacting to Sakura's chakra as it spread across the napkin.

"_Sakura-chan. I simply cannot accept that this is your fate. This is my last ditch effort to fulfill the promise I made to you when I assured you that everything would be okay. The key will open your cell, giving you the opportunity to escape. In addition, during the nightly shift change, I will be calling an ANBU meeting to discuss an Akatsuki sighting during a recent mission. This will minimize the number of patrolling ANBU that may hinder your escape. If you run into trouble, and have no way out, this napkin conceals a Corpse Scroll, which will react to your chakra and create a lifeless body in your likeness. If they think you are dead, they will stop looking for you. I have done all I can, the rest is in your hands. Good luck."_

Sakura hurriedly tucked the napkin into her shirt next to the key. It was as if Tsunade had read her mind. Now, her escape seemed promising, and she may even be able to continue helping Konoha from the shadows if the Corpse Scroll fooled the ANBU like Tsunade had hoped.

In a short amount of time, Sakura's mood had gone from miserable, to excited. She was no longer mourning her own death. She was ready to accept her new challenge.

Sakura scanned the room for something to pass the time until the shift change. All she had was the food tray of brown green peas. And a spoon. And the stone wall. That would do.

Sakura used the spoon to poke around in the soupy mess of peas until she found one firm enough to be a suitable projectile. She loaded the once vegetable onto the spoon, bent the flimsy metal utensil back and sent the pea zooming towards the far wall.

"Splat!"

It was a gross, if not slightly satisfying sound.

Several dozen pea splats later, Sakura felt the ANBU guards around the perimeter of the building move. Most headed to Hokage tower, none were immediately replaced. It was time.

Sakura bent the spoon back and took aim at the stone wall, now peppered with a brown green rash. She focused her chakra and let the pea fly.

"Ninpou, Fukappatsu na Jikoku no Jutsu."

* * *

A/N: That's two extra updates in one week! I'm on a roll! A shorter chapter, mostly introspective, that's why. Only two chapters left! I want to thank everyone who reviewed, especially my anonymous reviewers, since I can't respond to them personally. Muse monkey is getting fat! We have a contest winner, and the synopsis for their prize request is posted on my profile. Since it will no longer be a one-shot, since I'm overzealous like that, I can only work on one of my other two stories before things start getting neglected. So I posted a poll, so everyone else can help me decide which one to write first, since I love them both equally. Thanks for reading!


	11. Into the Fire

**Shinri "Truth"**

* * *

**Chapter Eleven – Into the Fire**

**Truth - actuality or actual existence.**

* * *

The pea came to a steady halt halfway squished against the wall's stony surface. Tiny particles of pea guts had begun to radiate from the point of impact, but they too were slowed to what Sakura perceived to be a stop in mid air.

To her relief, Sakura found that moving around regularly in altered time did not take any extra chakra, since simply maintaining the jutsu was slowly but steadily draining her low chakra reserves. The meal and rest had done their job, but it still wasn't enough to bring her back to the condition a real night's worth of sleep and an actually respectable meal would have.

Sakura pulled out the key Tsunade had snuck to her, and easily opened the door. She tucked the key back into her shirt, so she wouldn't leave behind any evidence as to the nature of her escape. Without wasting any more time, she tore off running down the prison's halls towards the exit, carefully avoiding any chakra signatures in the building.

Just as Tsunade had promised, the guards on duty were scarce, and Sakura made it to the only exit without a chakra seal without incident. Outside, however, there were still several guards hanging around in the open field between the jail and the Hokage's tower. There was no way Sakura would be able to find cover in the dirt clearing. Her only chance of escape was to simply run past them, and hope that the time jutsu would make her fast enough so they wouldn't notice.

The guards were barely moving, as if they were being held back by a thick viscous element which invisibly surrounded them. They could have been swimming in clear goo for all appearances. The closest ANBU guard, only about twenty feet from the entrance of the jail where Sakura was concealed, had his back to her, though he seemed to be in the act of turning around based on the awkward placement of his feet. Sakura took a deep breath, and bolted.

Without a backward glance, Sakura leapt over the buildings at the edge of the clearing and continued running until sheer exhaustion forced her to stop and release the time jutsu. With the jutsu released, Sakura could maintain a slow jog easily enough, and continued through the back alleys and over the roof tops on the familiar path to her home. A hurried glance with her chakra reassured her that her escape had gone unnoticed, for now. It likely would only be a matter of minutes before they realized her cell was empty, and began the pursuit.

Sakura risked lingering in Konoha for a few extra minutes for the sake of the few precious items she absolutely couldn't leave without. The first of them was still in her room at home, which unfortunately was not on the way to the training field where she had hidden the scrolls. It didn't matter. It was worth it to her.

She slipped silently into her open bedroom window. Her mother's chakra was in the kitchen, busy and chaotic. News of Sakura's arrest must have reached her, keeping her awake and worried. There wouldn't be time for a proper good bye. Guilt flooded over Sakura as she snuck over to the closet and pulled out her rain cloak. The heavy fabric would be an added burden, but a welcome one when prolonged exposure to the elements meant certain death, escape or no.

Silently, Sakura crept over to her bed. She gently plucked the picture of team seven from her bedside table. She hesitated for a second, running her fingers over the cool metal of the frame. They seemed so young back then, but only a few years had passed in reality. So young, so full of hope, and most importantly, together. Would they ever be together again? A tear threatened to escape from the edge of her lashes, and she hurriedly removed the picture from the glass and tucked it safely in the pocket of her rain coat.

Sakura's luck had run out it seemed, when several searching chakra reached her senses. They had already noticed she was missing. Several squads had been sent out, about a dozen ANBU in all. They were concentrated at the edges of the village, anticipating Sakura's appearance. She couldn't waste anymore time, she had already wasted too much. She could have been out of the village by now, but as it was she still had to stop at the training field. Without the scrolls, all of her effort would have been for nothing.

Concealing her chakra, Sakura slipped back out of her home, and giving it one last backward glance, began to sneak as fast as she could towards the training field. Her progress was promising, as she flew through the streets and in a matter of minutes entered the training field.

As she ran through the open area of the training field heading directly for the scrolls, several kunai flew with startling accuracy out of the adjacent tree line. Most missed, but one grazed Sakura in the shoulder, and another hit her squarely in the back of her left leg.

"_Shit!_" Sakura cursed to herself but ignored the pain, and picked up speed. Her leg protested and nearly froze up, but she couldn't stop. She wouldn't stop. She was almost there.

Three ANBU materialized in front of her. When had they entered the field? Sakura hadn't even noticed them. She realized with a sinking dread that she was in way over her head. There was no way she was going to be able to fight her way through them. All she had on her side was what little she could surprise them with, since few of them likely appreciated what a pink haired petite Chuunin medic was capable of.

Sakura let out a frightened gasp, which was her instinct, only she didn't suppress it. She needed to distract them, make them underestimate her, even if just a little, as she charged her good leg with chakra. She opened the first gate again, and found the flow of chakra released to be much smaller than normal, but continued charging her leg as she stepped backwards, as if retreating. They didn't follow her movement, since another ANBU team was moving into position to cut her off. When Sakura's right foot landed on the ground milliseconds later, instead of turning to run, she shot skywards. The force of the impact split the dry earth asunder, and like a gaping monstrous mouth, it belched out a choking cloud of dust which surrounded the ANBU still standing in the field.

"Fifth's! Apprentice!" she heard one of them cough out to his team mates as the dust filled his lungs.

Sakura smirked a little smugly, "_It's about time they took me seriously_."

Though considering the situation, every bit they underestimated her was also appreciated. While airborne over the ANBU's heads, Sakura surveyed the situation below. As the dust settled, she realized how incredibly outnumbered she was. Six ANBU were visible in the field below, and at least six more were rapidly approaching, alerted to the conflict by Sakura's massive strength. Her only hope was to use the time jutsu again, but even with the first chakra gate was open, she had no chakra reserves left. She was dead in the water.

Several ANBU had regrouped, and they began to volley kunai at her again before Sakura had even gotten the chance to hit the ground. She took a rare opportunity as a kunai zipped past her head. She focused on the object and formed the hand seals with blinding speed as more kunai began to rain down on her. The second volley hit only metal, as Sakura replaced herself with the earlier kunai. The replacement jutsu had allowed her to reach the tree line without any additional injuries. She nearly gave her position away with a cheer as she located the hollow tree concealing the scrolls. To her relief, the bag was still where she had left it. Sakura was about to reach into the tree when she was forced to jump aside to dodge yet another volley of thrown weapons. The ANBU had found her again.

"_Gods, they're __**fast**_," she groaned in frustration. Sakura scanned the area for an out, but to her dismay, they already had her surrounded. She was done.

"_No_!" Sakura yelled angrily at herself, "_It isn't going to end here!_"

Sakura concentrated her focus, and searched within herself for her last chance of escape. The second chakra gate. Kyuumon, the Gate of Rest. She found it near the first gate, and with just as little effort, opened it just as she had opened the first gate. Her chakra flared, faintly visible in the darkness and it snaked around her menacingly as she struggled to control it. It took a little more concentration for her to tame the refreshed flow of chakra, but after a few hard seconds, she managed.

One nearby ANBU noticed the change in her chakra and took a step back. The surrounding ANBU echoed his motion, and Sakura didn't hesitate to capitalize on their surprise. She performed the time jutsu again, and with time slowed to a crawl Sakura snatched up her pack with the scrolls and leapt into the trees. She ran at top speed, trying to put as much distance between her and Konoha as her rejuvenated chakra reserves would allow. Unfortunately, the second gate was proving to be harder to control, and her chakra was getting low again much more quickly than with the first gate.

"_Maybe they call it the Gate of Rest because that's what you're going to need after you use it_," Sakura thought cynically.

The forest was quickly becoming less familiar as Sakura ran, giving her confidence in the distance. She had decided early on to head in a southerly direction, simply because there was nothing there. The endless woods of Fire country stretched towards the coast and a huge crescent shaped peninsula, where Wave and Tea country bordered Fire country. It was a no-mans land of untouched wilderness and the odd tiny town, all ungoverned by no particular Shinobi nation. Sakura hoped it would greatly reduce her chances of running into anyone, especially Shinobi. Surviving in the wilderness, going days or weeks without seeing a town, was going to be hard, but Sakura knew she could rely on her survival training, and scratch out a living day by day.

But then what? What after that? Would she be spending too much time surviving to train and become capable of helping her village like she had planned? Would the daily grind wear her down to nothingness? If she tried to train, would she just end up killing herself? Hunted, alone, and balancing on a knife edge. It seemed no matter which step she took, she could easily fall to her death. Sakura was beginning to regret her decisions. But in Konoha, she absolutely would have been killed. Out here, at least, she was still alive. For now.

After what felt like hours of running, Sakura couldn't take another step. Satisfied that it would be a little while before her pursuers had gathered their wits, she hunkered down in a small crevice between two huge tree trunks for as much rest as her stressful situation would allow. Her chakra reserves were completely drained. She shivered from the cold night and from the symptoms of chakra exhaustion. Unable to keep her eyelids open, Sakura slowly fell into an unwelcome sleep bordering on unconsciousness, hoping that nothing dangerous lurked in the shadows beyond her meager shelter.

* * *

The next instant, it was dawn. Sakura's eyes snapped open as the first rays of the sun pierced the thick canopy and shot her in the face. She groaned, and tried to remove herself from her sleeping crevice. It was nearly impossible for her to move. Her joints were stiff and her body felt like it was made of iron. She felt sick and cold, and knew that it was all a side effect of overusing her chakra. The second gate, at this point, was definitely for emergency use only.

On the bright side, her injuries from the conflict with the ANBU should have healed almost completely when she opened the second gate. But her left leg was still very sore, and Sakura realized that it was still injured when she reached down and felt it with her hand. Running with the injury had been a mistake, and now Sakura wasn't sure if any amount of medical jutsu would make the muscle heal properly. At least it wasn't bleeding anymore. In any case, she was in no condition to do anything about it now.

After several painful minutes, Sakura pried herself from between the trees and stood shakily to her feet. The visible area of woods was peaceful enough, and the birds were waking and chirping normally, which told her that there was no pressing danger.

Standing was proving to be entirely too much effort, so Sakura slumped to the ground and began to rummage through her things to whet out a plan of action. In her possession, she had her rain cloak, the team seven photograph, the cell key, her ancestor's scrolls, Lee's book and Tsunade's corpse scroll. That was it. Laid out in front of her, the objects brought no comfort, only the cold harshness of Sakura's new reality. She had no food, no weapons, no supplies of any sort to speak of. She had no money. She had no idea where the nearest town was. She suddenly noticed the birds stop singing.

She wasn't alone anymore. She slung her rain coat over her shoulders and began to stuff her things back in it. Her photograph, Lee's book, the key- Her dulled senses took far too long to detect the ANBU only a few feet from her, calmly walking through the forest in her direction.

"There she is," one commented to the other offhandedly.

"What, the!? How the hell did she get all the way out here?" the other asked incredulously when they stopped confidently right in front of Sakura.

She looked up at them, still sitting on the ground, with the rest of her meager possessions still strewn around her.

"That's unimportant. You know the mission."

Sakura's eyes narrowed when the calmer ANBU drew his short sword. She clutched nervously for the nearest object and held it up in front of her as if the tiny paper scroll would be able to stop his shinken.

The sword whistled as it sliced through the air and easily tore through the hapless scroll. It sliced Sakura's cheek as it continued through its arc towards her unguarded throat, splashing blood across her cloak and the outstretched scroll .

Suddenly, the scroll pulsed and exploded in a burst of smoke that filled the woods. The attacking ANBU and Sakura were blown away from each other, his sword avoiding Sakura's neck by millimeters. In the confusion, Sakura stumbled into the woods and hid as well as she could manage. Running would just give her position away in her condition.

"What the hell was that?" the younger ANBU demanded as he helped the one that had been thrown by the blast to his feet. The smoke cleared, and thrown back in a prone position, with the cut explosives tag still clutched in her hand, was the body of the pink haired medic they had been chasing. Sakura bit back a gasp at how well the body resembled her. She noticed with morbid fascination that the body had taken both the blow from the sword and the brunt of the blast, creating fatal wounds. It was incredibly believable. Or unbelievable. Either way, Sakura had to hand it to Tsunade-shishou.

"Nice try," the ANBU checked for her pulse and confirmed her identity, "But not good enough. Sorry, kid." He ran his hand over the fake Sakura's face, closing her eyes.

And luck, it seemed, was on her side again.

"What about these scrolls?"

Or maybe not. The other ANBU began to collect the body, and Sakura's scrolls, which she had stupidly left behind in her scurry to safety.

"Everything goes to the Hokage."

The next instant, the ANBU, the fake Sakura, and Miharu's priceless scrolls were gone.

* * *

Sakura had no idea how long she had simply laid on the ground in the underbrush, fighting back tears of anger and frustration. She was devastated. She was near breaking. She had lost the scrolls, everything she had worked for. It was all gone. What was the point anymore? How was she going to learn the jutsu now? How would she use them to help her precious people, like her ancestor had asked her to? What would happen when the council read them? Would they use them for the wrong reasons? Maybe they would destroy them. It was the best outcome Sakura could hope for now.

She poured through her mind, trying to remember what the scrolls had in them. To her credit, she remembered most of what was in them, the important information at least. Maybe they weren't completely lost after all. Sakura had a propensity for recalling information she had read, even if just once. If she could write down the information before she forgot, it would be almost as good as having the scrolls themselves. That way, at least, she could still work on the jutsu.

The path had been made for her. She needed to find a village, or someone who had paper that she could use. She had no idea where she was in the forest, she had no idea which way to go to find a village, but at least she knew what she had to do when she got there.

It was about midday, so Sakura was confident that the ANBU had been long gone, since they believed their mission to be successful. She assessed her injuries, and while bloodied, dirty and exhausted, she found herself to be in no immediate danger of death or infection. With a determined grimace, she pushed herself to her feet and limped off towards the south, to no particular destination.

* * *

It was nearing evening, and Sakura decided that she was better off resting, since she was at least no longer being hunted. The forest seemed completely empty, and she had only stumbled across the occasional squirrel, or spied the movement of birds in the canopy all day. She was completely alone. It was both comforting and alarming. No one to hurt her, but also no one to hold her. She found it odd to be both yearning for and fleeing from human contact.

A rocky outcrop worn down by years of weather and the roots of trees offered a small bit of shelter. The sky was cloudy, but didn't threaten with rain, so Sakura figured that continuing to search for better cover would be a waste of energy. She painstakingly began to gather wood and deposit it on the stony ground on the leeward side of the rock.

After an hour of slow aching toil, Sakura had gathered a sufficient pile of wood.

The sun was beginning to set, so she summoned up the chakra for a pathetically small fire jutsu, just enough to light the kindling and start the fire. Once it began burning well on its own, Sakura slouched back against the rock face and draped her cloak around her.

With the warmth and security the fire offered, Sakura began to succumb to her drowsiness. She managed to keep her mind awake long enough to repeat to herself the contents of all four of Miharu's scrolls. She absolutely could not forget a single word. On the second round of repetition, utterly exhausted, she collapsed into sleep.

* * *

Sakura startled awake to the sound of a horse whinny. She bolted upright as quickly as her exhaustion would let her. It was still the dead of night, and her fire hadn't burnt down far. Ahead of the rock she was sleeping by, in the nearby clearing, stood a horse drawn cart. Four horses were harnessed to the front of the covered cart, but it looked unmanned.

"_Merchants?_" Sakura wondered to herself, "_Maybe they have paper!_"

In her excitement, she began to stumble sleepily towards the cart, hoping to find someone inside.

"Hello?" she called out, not wanting to be rude or startle anyone.

"Hello, to you, girlie," Sakura spun around at the man's voice, but she was too slow. The next instant a bag was shoved over her head and Sakura felt a heavy weapon crash down on her skull.

* * *

A/N: I know! I know! I leave you for... I forget even how long, and then I dump you with a short chapter with a freaking cliff hanger! I'm evil, now you all have proof. I really didn't mean to go so long between updates, but I got stuck with several days of 10-15 hour shifts at work, which make me too exhausted to write, then I got kidnapped by my boyfriend for more than a week (to a place with NO INTERNETZ DDDX) for fun in the sun while we still have any sun left. But I'm back, and while I'll be working a good deal, and classes start in a few weeks, I promise that I won't go so long without so much as a howdy doodie ever again! OK? I still love you!!


	12. Understanding Strength and Love

**Shinri "Truth"**

* * *

A/N: Just a quick warning! This chapter is the entire reason for the M rating on the story. So let me restate it for safety: Rated M for violence, language, and adult themes. Expect to see them all. Thank you for your attention, and enjoy the chapter!

* * *

**Chapter Twelve: Understanding Strength and Love**

**Truth - ideal or fundamental reality apart from and transcending perceived experience: the basic truths of life.**

* * *

Sakura struggled to open her eyes. It was hard for her to tell whether or not she had been successful, since wherever she was, it seemed completely dark. She blinked furiously, the only motion she was capable of, and tiny pin pricks of light became apparent. She was inside a small wooden room. There was no light inside, but it was obviously daylight outside from the tiny rays of sun squeezing their way past the wood slats. The feeble lighting wasn't enough to give Sakura any visible indication of her whereabouts or predicament, but continued attempts to move gave her all of the information she needed.

She was thoroughly restrained, and while the ropes were made of regular fiber, Sakura lacked the strength to struggle against them. She was laying prone, on her back, with her hands above her head and her legs tied down in what would have been an embarrassing spread if she hadn't been alone. The unyielding wood of the table she was strapped to pressed against her skin, telling her that her clothes had been completely removed. Sakura blushed in spite of herself in the darkness.

Her entire body ached, which wasn't unexpected considering that she had been suffering from chakra exhaustion, but the severity and locations of the aches and burns were new, and more brutal than she remembered. The new wound she remembered receiving was a terrible throb on the left side of her head where her attacker had hit her with something blunt and heavy. Sakura was infuriated with herself for allowing someone to sneak up behind her like that. Wasn't she supposed to be a Shinobi?

Not that her attacker would have known, given the ease of her capture and her lack of identifying clothing. For all appearances, she probably looked like a lost civilian, not the Shinobi apprentice of an infamous Hokage. Than why bother capturing her? Sakura had yet to reason out the man's objectives and motivation for attacking her.

As the stress of her situation and restraints continued to bear down on her, Sakura broke into a cold sweat. Immediately, small areas of her skin began to burn, telling her that she had dozens of shallow abrasions all over her. She hadn't had a chance to struggle, so when did they happen?

She continued to assess the damage to her body when her focus landed on her abdomen and legs. The ache there was not easily explained away by her old wound and the exhaustion of running and walking constantly with no chakra assistance. Her thighs especially burned, and felt swollen. All over her lower body, she felt itchy little cuts, and her groin was especially painful, as if she had been kicked by a metal spiked boot.

While focusing on the confusing sensations, realization slowly dawned on her. She fought back nausea and horror as the reason for her capture and the pain all over her body became disgustingly clear. He had raped her.

Sakura fought back the involuntary convulsions that threatened to wrack her body as anger and terror washed over her in waves. The emotions building up inside of her were almost more than she could bear, and she wondered how much worse it would have been for her if she hadn't been unconscious through all of it. Her ever present split personality came into intense conflict as she struggled with the desire to either slowly and painfully kill the horrible little man, or collapse into herself helplessly.

Her more aggressive personality broke to the forefront and Sakura tried to struggle more violently, but her muscles just wouldn't cooperate. She considered that the new wounds may have caused enough blood loss to cause her already weakened body to become completely useless. He hadn't taken much effort to restrain her, but it seemed that, in her condition, it was more than enough. Simply breaking free and escaping was not an option.

It seemed that Sakura was again waiting for rescue. How did she find herself in such helpless situations so often lately? It was frustrating, and disheartening. Maybe she wasn't cut out for being a missing-nin at all. Maybe she would just die out here in this miserable place, stripped of her dignity, instead of in Konoha where she would have at least been able to hold her head high as she marched to her death.

Muffled voices broke the silence of the dark little room, and scratching to her right made Sakura realize that she had visitors. Suddenly, a door swung open and a blinding flood of white light spilled into the room, followed immediately by two dark silhouettes. The door closed again, shutting out the sunlight, but a flash of a match filled the room again with an eerie orange glow.

Sakura heard the clank of a lantern as one of the other people in the room lit the device and set it on a nearby surface. The orange glow intensified, but Sakura closed her eyes against the light, instead of surveying her surroundings. She wasn't ready to face anything yet. She wanted to be unconscious again, but such a thing didn't come from willpower alone.

"Man, you weren't kidding."

Sakura refrained from looking for the source of the voice, but listened intently. In spite of her helplessness, her survival instincts kicked in, and she hoped they would reveal some useful information. Anything that could help her now or when she escaped. If she escaped.

"Pretty little thing, isn't she? Makes me wonder how she ended up way the hell out here."

Sakura recognized the whiny high pitched voice of her captor. The other man's voice was deeper, more menacing.

"She sleeping?"

"Dunno. She didn't wake up at all when I had my fun, but maybe she'll wake up for you. Either way, the price is the same."

"Whatever, just so long as I can do whatever I want."

"Sure, have at it. I don't have the resources to keep them fed, so I pick them up, then dump them when I've made my money. You're the last client I'll have for a while, so you get the special treatment."

"Gee, thanks."

She heard the men shuffle around, as if they were preparing something, but so far, neither of them had made a move to touch her. Sakura continued to feign sleep.

"What you doing way out here yourself?"

"Mercenary, you know the type. I imagine that's who most of your clientele are anyway, being a little less than a reputable merchant yourself."

Coins jingled as they passed hands. The small talk continued as the money was counted.

"Who you working for now?"

"The Fire country's Daimyo had some political competitor's family assassinated. Stuff his honorable little Shinobi village won't touch, probably because of that woman Hokage, but that just means more work for people like me."

Sakura did her best not to shout out in fury. The cowardly little bastard that had ruined her life was paying mercenaries to do his dirty work. She had never wished for someone's death as much as she wished for his.

"Kids and all?"

"Yeah, the whole family. This guy had a pretty little wife too. She was fun."

"Heh, well, I'll leave you to it."

The door opened and closed again and Sakura realized that she was alone with the mercenary. She fantasized about it all being a clever ruse and the man was actually here to rescue her. Someone of honor would have finally graced her path. She heard him move around more and her stomach flipped when she realized that he was removing his pants.

His hands suddenly appeared at her chest, and Sakura wasn't able to suppress a tiny squeak of disgust.

"Oh, so you're awake after all."

She heard a weapon being drawn from a sheath, and the next instant she felt a sharp blade being drawn across her chest between her breasts. She refused to let out another sound as the sudden pain took her breath away. Blood began to trickle down her stomach from the wound and pool in her navel.

"Tough little thing aren't you? Maybe I can talk the bastard into selling you to me, you seem like fun."

He continued to cut her. The gashes were shallow, and his actions were slow, almost gentle if not for the inherent violence of the act.

"But, you seem like the type that would run if given the chance. Better keep that idea out of your head."

The knife moved to her legs and continued down to her feet. The blade stopped briefly at the ball of her right foot, then suddenly plunged into the flesh at the bottom of her foot. Sakura didn't dare give the man the satisfaction of hearing her cry or seeing her squirm. She remained silent and frozen, her mind beginning to detach itself from her body in self defense.

Slowly, methodically, the sharp edge of the blade sliced through Sakura's foot, creating a flap of bloodied skin. The blade stopped. He grabbed the small section of skin roughly, and yanked down, hard. Tears filled Sakura's eyes involuntarily as the skin on the bottom of her foot was completely ripped free from the bone. She began to feel light headed, like she was sinking down into velvety darkness. The sickening splat of her own flesh hitting the ground snapped her back to reality.

"There," the man laughed a little, "Now you can't run."

Sakura could only hear the beating of her own heart loudly in her head. The man had stopped laughing. He had stopped moving. It was as if he wasn't even there. For a second, Sakura dared to wish he had left. The sound that had distracted him finally reached her ears. A wolf howl.

Suddenly the muffled world outside of the dark little room came to panicked life. There were more people than Sakura had realized outside, and they were all shouting and running in a fit of hysteria. The wolf howled again, louder and closer than the last. A new noise erupted in the din outside. Whining and yelping. Puppies?

The mercenary cursed suddenly, "Shit, they came for the cubs."

In an instant, he was gone. Sakura was saved, again. But what exactly was going on? The chaos escalated outside. Men scrambling for weapons. Another howl, as close as the men, and the puppies fell silent. The voices of the men changed to battle cries, and amid the yelling and clatter, Sakura could discern vicious snarls and growls. Suddenly, the room shook as if it had been struck by something huge. Another collision, and the tiny structure was thrown on its side. Strapped down and unable to defend herself, Sakura could only helplessly watch as she fell head first into the wall.

* * *

When Sakura came to, the first thing she noticed was the silence. The battle that had been raging when she hit her head was completely gone. The room was still on its side, and Sakura was still strapped to the table, which had landed on top of her during the collision. She tried to move, and found that the ropes binding her were looser.

The table was heavy, and Sakura realized that several objects had fallen onto the table, breaking one of the legs, freeing one of the ropes just enough for her to get her hands free. With painful effort, she scooted out from under the table and sat up as much as her trapped lower body would allow.

Sakura was nearly hyperventilating with excitement as she felt around blindly for something sharp enough to cut the ropes that still bound her feet. Her hand wandered over the cluttered wall, which was now serving as the floor. She stopped when she felt something moist and soft, and recoiled in horror when she realized that it was the bottom of her own foot. Sakura had witnessed some devastating injuries as a medic at the hospital, but it still took all of her energy to push the revulsion back.

She continued searching, far from the offensive bit of flesh. Eventually she found a hammer. It wasn't a knife, but it would do. She ignored the protests of her body as she twisted herself around so she could swing at the table legs with her new weapon. Her skin burned and crawled as she moved, as if she was on fire, but she swung at the table with determination. Even her face seemed stiff and bloodied, but she continued to work.

The blows reverberated loud and hollow inside the tiny wooden box she was trapped in, and Sakura wondered if there was anyone left alive to hear her escape attempts. Finally, after an endless amount of effort Sakura was able to pry the table legs off and slip the ropes from her ankles. She scrambled around in the darkness on her hands and knees.

Finally, in a gesture of pity, fate allowed her to stumble across her rain cloak at the far corner of the room. All of her precious little things were still there. Sakura hurriedly wrapped the thick comforting fabric around herself and curled up in a ball. She breathed in the scent of the cloak. It smelled like her room at home, and the fragrance surrounded her, blocking out the stench of blood that soaked her wooden prison.

No longer concerned with pride or dignity, Sakura began to sob. She cried with joy for finding the cloak and being free of the table. She cried from the pain in her body. She cried from the pain in her heart. She cried because she was broken. She was exhausted. All she wanted to do was sleep. She wanted to stay curled up in her cloak, until her pain faded when death took her.

Absentmindedly, her hand slipped into a pocket, and her fingers brushed the edges of the team seven photograph. They would never be together again if she let it end this way. She had to be strong, she had to keep fighting, she had to survive, so she could meet them again someday.

But, first, she had to get out of the room. She reached up for a hand hold, and finding the wood supports of the ceiling, hoisted herself to her feet. Her fleshless bloody foot stuck to the wood of the wall, but she didn't have the chakra to heal herself. It and all of her other injuries would have to wait.

She searched above her for the door she remembered, and found it, delightfully unsecured. It fell outwards and Sakura pushed it aside and clambered painfully out of the hole. In the overcast daylight Sakura could examine the small cuts all over her body. Instead of simple long gashes, the men had carved profanity all over her body, especially on her chest and legs. Anger welled up inside of her, but her attackers were most likely long gone, thankfully. Exhausted, she sat on the side of the carriage and surveyed the scene around her.

Utter devastation. The room she had been trapped in was one of several wooden carriages in a large caravan of bandit-merchants and mercenaries. The fragile wooden structures were strewn about, many crushed, and while most of the horses had escaped, several lay dead, caught in the melee. The bodies of the dozens of men she had heard were strewn amongst the wooden debris, and most of them looked half mauled, some were missing limbs, or even their heads.

The creatures that had attacked hadn't fared much better either. Several huge white and grey wolves, their shiny fur stained with blood, laid dead near the center of the makeshift camp. They were nearly as large as the draft horses, and Sakura had never seen anything like them before. Across from Sakura's wagon was the reason for the attack. A pile of almost a dozen fluffy white puppies, their throats slit by sharp weapons. The rescue had come too late, and from the look of it, the rescuers didn't make it either.

The pain in Sakura's heart and body had faded to a dull throbbing ache, and she carefully lowered herself to the ground. The dead body of one of the horses served as a convenient but morbid step down. She let go of the carriage, but her wounded legs gave out and she tumbled down the rest of the way to the ground. The impact caused the pain in her body to flare up again and she laid still for a few more minutes in a defeated crumpled pile.

Just when she was ready to try standing and walking, movement in front of her caught her attention. Someone was rummaging through a nearby cart. The man came into view. She didn't recognize him, but he seemed to know her.

"Well, well. Girlie survived," he snickered. Sakura glared at him as he limped over to her. Her captor had survived the fight, but he didn't escape injury. He was almost as much of a bloody mess as she was. Sakura tried to find her voice, but her throat was dry, and only a strangled growl managed to force itself past her lips.

She scrambled around for a weapon, and found a large carpenter's spike sticking out of the side of the damaged cart next to her. The huge metal fastening came free easily, and Sakura brandished it with as much bravado as her weakened state would allow.

He was undeterred. He continued forward, and unsheathed his own weapon, a huge sword, and grinned triumphantly.

"Mine's a tad bigger, huh?"

His final step was cut short when a tiny snarling ball of black shot out from behind the dead horse and attached itself to his wounded leg.

"What the _fuck_!" he kicked madly, sending the black puppy flying, and sending himself off balance. Unable to fight gravity he toppled forwards, right on top of Sakura and her outstretched weapon. His weight pinned her arms against the ground, and Sakura gasped in shock when she realized that he had landed head first on the iron spike. She pried her hands free from his dead body, causing the tip of the spike protruding from the top of his skull to wiggle a little.

That was it, Sakura had seen enough. No longer able to fight back the nausea, she rolled over and dry heaved violently. Her empty stomach felt like it would turn itself inside out in an attempt to expel the imagined sickness. After a few minutes, Sakura's heaving had reduced itself to sobbing. But she could hear something else over her own cries. The puppy that had saved her was yelping pathetically and Sakura instinctively suppressed her own pain and crawled over to the source of the noise.

The little puppy had been thrown hard against another cart, and was laying sprawled on the ground crying out in pain. The cries seemed involuntary, and Sakura could tell that the little animal was having seizures from the shock of its injuries.

"No, no!" Sakura whispered as she scooted closer, "Don't die! You saved me!" She touched the puppy tentatively, and summoned some chakra to assess the damage. The tiny wolf had been cut in the throat, just like the rest, but the blade had barely missed the jugular, keeping the puppy from bleeding to death. Its leg was broken from the impact, and it had a concussion. There was no way Sakura was going to have the chakra to heal the puppy. Not without risking her own life.

"You risked your life for me," Sakura told the little wolf with resolve, "It's the least I can do for you."

She summoned her courage, and her focus, and opened the first two chakra gates. The pain was instant and blinding, but she set to work through her tears. She worked diligently, with conviction and hope until her body finally gave out and Sakura collapsed into unconsciousness.

* * *

When Sakura finally woke, she realized instantly that she wasn't alone. A warm little tongue and cold wet nose slobbered happily all over her face as Sakura struggled to rise. She hadn't died from opening the gates, but her body was partially paralyzed. She couldn't move from her spot.

In fact, she was exactly where she last remembered being, laying unprotected amidst the wreckage of the caravan. It was daylight, but it was cloudy, so Sakura wasn't sure what time of day it was. It didn't matter, since all Sakura could do was rest and heal.

Her little black wolf companion had healed marvelously, and to Sakura's surprise, had stuck around. On top of it, the pup had gathered some food from the supplies in the carts and had deposited it at Sakura's feet.

"It's like you know what I need to get better," Sakura reached out and ruffled the wolf's fur. Sakura had realized that the puppy was a girl while she was healing her. Since she seemed to be sticking around, Sakura began to brainstorm a name while she ate the dry rations.

"All of your family was white or grey, but you're dark brown, almost black. You're like a little ball of soot or coal," the puppy cocked her head as Sakura talked, as if she was considering what was being said, "How about it? There's a type of coal that's the same color as you… what's it called? Oh, Kattan. Do you like it, Ka-chan?"

Ka-chan bounced happily and yelped in approval. Sakura laughed. It was the first time in days that she had really laughed. Kattan wagged her butt excitedly, and Sakura could swear that the little wolf's red-brown eyes sparkled with laughter too.

* * *

The days passed lazily but nervously. Kattan never left Sakura's side, except to scrounge around in the surrounding debris looking for treasures. The little wolf kept Sakura well fed, and even found her some clothes. All Sakura could do was eat, sleep, and heal herself with her slowly building chakra reserves. To her credit, her phenomenal medic skills were reversing much of the damage of the past few days, and soon she would have little more than scars to remember the trauma by.

The emotional scars were something else, though. Sakura wasn't sure they would ever heal completely, but at least Kattan was there to keep her company. The gregarious little puppy kept Sakura smiling in spite of herself, and Sakura didn't have the chance to get depressed or apathetic.

After nearly a week of rest, Sakura was well enough to stand and move around. She decided not to linger any longer, and began to gather supplies from the bandits' carts for the road ahead. Ka-chan bounced along behind Sakura as she slowly scavenged from cart to cart, filling a travel pack she had found in the rubble.

"You know, Ka-chan," Sakura spoke to the puppy as she worked, "I wouldn't have made it if it weren't for you. You saved my life literally, but you saved me in other ways too."

_It was the ones left behind, forced to live through the trauma, forced to pick up the pieces and try to keep on living in spite of it all, who Sakura felt for the most. She wondered if she would have had the strength or courage to move past such an experience. Or would she be one of the empty ones, the ones who looked like they were just waiting to die too. Could you ever smile again? Could you ever breathe again? Could you ever live again?_

"I think, that even if I had been able to live and survive on my own, I may not have found the motivation to do it," Ka-chan looked up at Sakura expectantly and perked her stubby little ears, "I was almost broken, I almost gave up. I didn't want to try to live anymore, it hurt too much."

Sakura shouldered the full bag and began to fill another. The weight would be hard to carry, but the food and supplies were invaluable. Kattan leapt into an overturned carriage and began to rummage around too. She dragged out a pile of clothes, and Sakura sorted through them in search of socks, gloves and other essentials.

"I realize now, what I was to my mother," Kattan was about to dive back into the cart but turned to listen when Sakura continued to speak, "She stayed alive, because of me. Her love for me gave her the strength to survive in spite of her pain."

_Realization dawned on her that she knew people who had lived through such an ordeal, and who had smiled for her. Her cheerful, happy, nagging, determined mother, had lived through worse trauma. Her family, and her loving husband had all been torn from her in a horrible war. Sakura was the only thing that her mother had left. She found herself suddenly admiring and understanding her mother more now than she ever had before. Sakura then hoped that if the day ever came she could be just as strong as her mother._

"I managed to find that strength that I admired her for, thanks to you," Sakura slung the other bag over her free shoulder and found that she was unlikely to be able to carry any more. Restocked and mostly healed, Sakura began again on her search for a village with paper. It was a small goal, but preserving the information her ancestor had given her was important to everything else Sakura hoped to achieve. Kattan waddled behind her as she headed into the woods.

"No matter what happens, from now on, as long as we stick together, we'll be okay," Sakura smiled down at her bouncy puff ball companion and laughed, "and that's the truth."

* * *

A/N: The end! Just kidding. Anyone who's been keeping track should realize that there are three parts to this story, and we've only seen one so far! I'm working hard on the second part, it's already outlined and everything, cause it's my favorite. It's called Soutou, which means 'Struggle'. When the first chapter for Soutou is posted, I'll post a 'Chapter Thirteen' on Shinri. So, if you want to be one of the first to know about part two, you only need to have a story alert on Shinri, and I'll do the rest. Thanks to everyone who reviewed and added me to their favorites along the way, it made the journey more enjoyable for me and kept the writing going! See you in part two!


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